I'm Broken but I'm fine

Part 8

LOUIS POV

I watch as the blood falls into the sink and washes down the drain, I can't help but cry, the pain in my left wrist is terrible and the emotional pain and confusion I'm having with Harry is getting overwhelming. Why did he cancel my train home? He probably doesn't want to deal with the fallout from Anne and my mum, but I would be the one suffering the consequences not him. Maybe he just doesn't want them thinking he didn't try, that he couldn't handle me. I understand how emotionally fucked up I am, I thought he would jump at the chance to get rid of me. I don't know how I'm going to make it through the next few months.

My wrist seems to be turning from yellow puss to green and that can't be good. I may need to sneak off to a doctor and get it treated without the boys knowing.

I clean myself up like usual, when I try to put my bracelets back on my wrist though it's to painful. I have to leave them off for now. I panic at having to go and eat breakfast without the security of my bracelets. What if someone sees my wrists. I put a black hoodie and my black jeans on and head downstairs. I see pancakes in the middle of the table and the boys huddled in the kitchen. I make my way in but they don't notice me.

"So it's the second dead body in three weeks?" Niall asks Liam and Zayn.

"Yep, but they think it's related to one of your guys" Zayn says back.

A dead body? The boys must have got a call from work while they were on holidays. I've never seen a dead body before. I don't know how Liam and Zayn work with them all the time.

"One of our guys?" Harry questions. The tone he uses with the other boys is so nice and I wonder why he is so mean to me. If there is more to it than me just being gay.

"Yeah, drug ring, this kid was 18 and the other 21, we think it's part of Stingers gang" Liam says.

"Oh fuck, that asshole better not be recruiting again, we just cleaned up his lot" Niall says angrily

"Yeah well, we don't know for sure but it looks like it. We are heading into the office for a little while to check some stuff out" Liam tells the boys.

"We will come" Harry says.

"Wait, what about Louis?" Zayn questions.

"Its not like he is two, I'm sure the dumb kid can stay by himself for a few hrs, what trouble could he possible get into" Harry says harshly.

My eyes widen at the comment. A dumb kid? I feel my breathing pick up.

"H, we all know why you are acting this way towards Louis but he doesn't, just chill the fuck out and tell him the truth" Niall says and walks away from the group, he then sees me.

"Louis?" He says sympathetically.

I see the other boys heads whip around at Niall calling me name.

"Ummm hey Louis, want some breakfast?" Zayn asks as he walks towards me.

"It's fine I can get it myself I'm not a two year old" I say back quietly as I walk towards the table.

The boys look at Harry angrily and I see his features full of regret....for only a few seconds though before his face is unreadable again.

"We are going into work today Louis, try and stay out of trouble while we are gone" Harry tells me.

"Whatever" I say back as I sit down at the table and play with the sleeves of my sweater,

The boys all wonder over and pile their plates with pancakes and dig into the food, it's like they haven't eaten in weeks.

"Eat some pancakes Lou, Harry made them, they are the best" Niall says with his mouth full.