The Journey[BoyxBoy]

Chapter Four:

I felt something stir within me. It flooded throughout me. I was going to be in Ripley soon. My hope for a new life there was rising higher than I would like but I couldn't control it. Anyways it was a lot better than thinking about all the hurt and loneliness. Some doubt trickled through but it was quickly told to shut up by my high hopes. I started to see my future roll out in front of me. I saw a nice aunt and grandparents. I didn't have grandparents that I could remember. Dad's parents had died before I was born. But my imagination ran wild. They would be so nice and supportive of me. They would never yell at me or hit me. They wouldn't care that I loved boys like girls. I would go to the high school there and be top of the class again. I would be the starter for their varsity baseball team. I would be popular and everybody would love me. No one would know besides my family about me being gay. They didn't need to know. Then I would go to college, preferably playing baseball for them also. I wanted to become a Major League baseball player. I wanted to be one of the greats, having kids look up to me as their hero. Yeah, that's what I wanted. With that I closed my eyes, feeling the train roll beneath me and let all my stiff, sore muscles relax. Slowly I drifted off into much needed sleep.

I was running down my old familiar hallway and into my room. Blood was streaming down my nose and down me. Behind me I could curses coming from his rough voice. His threats of what he was going to do to me when he got a hold of me. Fear drummed in my ears as I quickly closed the door to my room. His loud, angry fist beat up against the door, demonstrating what they could do to me. I scrambled with the lock, my hands to shaky to actually work. He busted through the door, sending me across the room. I reached for my baseball bat, seeing the murderous look shimmer in his eyes. I was going to die. I was going to die at the hands of my father. As he crept closer to me, I swung the bat at him, trying to defend myself. He dodged it and clutched it. I saw it go above his head. I screamed for help as it came right down.

I jerked awake, disoriented by the loud, screeching halt. I was still shaking with fear. My brain was trying to catch up. Wait I was in Ripley. These next few hours were going to dictate the start of my new life. I was going to leave behind those nightmares of hell. Alright Spencer as long as you do nothing stupid, you will have a new home. My stomach twisted. But I couldn't just stand around here. I was going to be found and that just couldn't happen. It wouldn't be good. I jump out of the train and snuck into the train station. This station was even smaller than the last. There was about ten old red chairs. Half of them looked to be broken. An elderly lady stood behind a ticket booth. I walked out calmly but inside my mind raced way ahead of me. Would they take me in? What if they didn't? I didn't want to end up like Carl. I was almost out of money with nowhere else to go. I needed this place. Calm down. Do one thing at a time. First I needed to find them. I looked closely at the bawled up paper with my mom's scrawled handwriting for the first time since I left. It only said Ripley,MI. There was no street name or numbers. My heart sank. Why didn't she write down the address. Then another guy-wrenching thought went through my head. What if they had moved? It's been at least sixteen years since they last had contact. They could be dead for all I know. Panic started to set in. Okay, Spencer, breathe. We need to start collecting information. Let's look them up and go from there. One problem at a time. Where was a directory then? Probably in the post office. Let's start there. With that new goal set, I started walking around downtown. All the buildings were brick and looked to be over a hundred years old. Not much seemed to have ever changed. They must like the eighteen hundreds, I guess. People walked around on the cracked sidewalks, staring me down. I had almost forgotten the distrust of strangers in a small town. I had to be a sight for sore eyes for them. I hadn't cleaned up more than a quick swim in a river in over a week. Hmm. maybe that smell on the train was me. Eww I hoped not. I couldn't check out here in the open. They thought I was weird enough as it is. So I casually continued to stroll down these sunny streets, ignoring the piercing stares until I found the post office. Inside I saw a payphone with a telephone book underneath. I went in, with the bell signaling my entrance. The older man noted my presence and continued talking to the lady he was helping. I went over to the telephone book and started to flip through it. I'm looking for Hartman. Hmm...I found three names: Albert, Cindy, Niccole,. Niccole was the only ones that sounded familiar. I think she was my mom's sister. I had names and addresses, that was something. One of them had to be alive and current. I looked up Niccole's address and kept repeating in over and over again in my head. I would try to find it on my own and if I couldn't then I would ask for help. Surely someone would know and be able to help me. As I turned around to leave, I bumped into someone.