The day I had you (Book 1) (A sad story) ~Completed~

Chapter16-The Sad Goodbye

I went home crying and I went upstairs to my room I was crying in my bed. Crying my heart out. Because I'm so confused and complicated I don't what do now.
Without him, I feel so empty and shattered inside. Because he had loved me so much as no one else could do.

2 years later.

After I broke up with Jaze I was more hurt than before because he loves and understands me in a deep manner only he and I could understand. Every day my heart aches as I thought of him. Every day I have a sleepless night thinking about him and I know it's not my fault I cannot love him like the way he used to love me but I had already loved him and he remains here in my heart and that will never change he still in my mind. I was more hurt when he left because he loves me more than anything and for who I was and who I am, I miss him, I said as cried. I miss him so much. Every day of my life is meaningless without him. Every day I thought about him and I feel so lonely as if I'm like a mirror shattering into a million pieces. I am so sorry my love I have left you. But without Jaze by my side. I was lost and I felt so alone and I cried all night because I regret that I let him go, I can't even go out with Anna, I was so depressed and crestfallen because he loves me for who I am and who I was I wonder what is he doing right now. Is he thinking about me? Because it's hard to forget someone who loved you and cherished you.

After Elsa broke up with me, I feel sad and lonely because she was the light throughout my day and I truly love her with all my heart and I deeply understood her and I gave my all just to love her. But I also understand that she doesn't love me she told me from the start that she isn't ready for another relationship even she didn't tell me I can tell but I told her to let me just love her and she agreed to that. I accepted her even though she doesn't love me, I let her go because I know she cannot truly be happy with me because she still loves him but he doesn't love her, he has hurt once. He can do it again. I have been in my room for days when I'm hungry I eat some pizza in the fridge, without her, I don't feel like eating because every time I eat I thought of her. I really really miss her, her voice her soft hair her beautiful face everything about her. I miss her so much. I know what if I call her.
I picked up my phone from my bedside table and looked at her number. He was thinking if he should call her. Maybe she needs some more space and time to think about it, to think about me and reconsider But It's been two years already. Maybe she's alright now.

Okay I'm ready to love again I will not be scared anymore because someone is loving me truly and he honestly has helped me get over my first love who had hurt me so much, But I can't deny that whenever I hear his name it still hurts. But I have to let go because if I keep holding on, I will suffer because he loves himself more than me. But okay, I will still allow him to be a part of my life. I will allow him again to love me again. Let's see, because I already moved on and I decided to not love him anymore because if I did I'll be hurt all over again. But okay let's give him one last chance.
Let's see if I will fall for him again.
Then my phone rang and I answered it by saying:
      "Hello," I said through the phone.
I heard a voice I thought I'd never heard again.                        
"Elsa?" Jack said through the line.
     "What is it Jack why did you called."
     "Please accept me again into your life, please I can't live without you," he said.
"Okay, I was about to that anyway," she said and hung up.

I will give Jack a chance to love me again because I know I still love him but I'm scared to be hurt again. But if he hurts again, I will go back to the man who loves me more than anything. "Jaze,"

     "Elsa, "someone knocks on her door.
     "Come in?" I said.
When her sister came in she sat on the bed and sighed.
      "Anna, it's you is there a problem?" she asked.
      "No, but Hans has not been texting me lately and I'm worried, he has someone else," she said.
      "The only way for you know that is..... Wait has Hans been cold to you lately?"
     "No, not at all,"
     "Maybe he's just busy Anna,"
     Maybe?" she said. Oh, have you told Jaze yet," she asked.
     "About what?"
     "You know about your breakup," she whispered.
     "Oh, that," I asked.
     "Did you tell him yet?" she asked again.
     "No, "I answered.
     "Why not?" she asked.
     "Because I don't want to hurt him,"
     "Elsa, aren't you already hurting him because you still love Jack and not him.
"You're right Anna I am hurting him. He's suffering because of me. I have to let him go, for him to be happy,"
     "But, will you be okay without him by your side.
     "I don't know, but I must do this I can't fool myself anymore, "I said.
      "So are you really breaking up with him?" she asked.
     "I have to. Because I have already loved him and I cannot bear to see him suffer because of me, "I said as were tears threatening to fall from my eyes.
And I cried. Her sister notices her crying and comforted her to make stop her crying. But she cannot stop crying.
     "I love him," that's why I need to let him go.
     "Can you manage to be happy without him?"
     "I had to, I'll call him now,"
As Elsa was reaching her phone in her pocket. Anna stopped her from doing so.
     "Elsa, are you really going to do it?" she asked.
     "Yes, Anna, "I answered.
She took out her phone and dial his number.
But it's out of reach, so she decided to go to his house instead she took her car and drove there. She got down and rang the doorbell. Then James opened the door.
     "Elsa? Cutie what's brings you here?" he said.
     "Um, is your brother there?"
     "Jaze?" he asked.
     "Yes, him," she replied.
     "No, he's not here," he answered.
     "Where is he?" "I need to talk to him," she said.
     "Wait, there I'll call him," he said and excuse himself.
"Okay, I'll wait here," she said.
Jaze was with Maddie because Maddie called her to talk.
     "Say it, I haven't got all day," he said.
    "I still love you, Jaze," she said.
Why can't you understand. I don't love you anymore, so please leave me alone," he said.
     "Jaze, please listen to me,"
     "No, why should I listen all you say is lies! Leave me alone.
Then she pulled Jaze close so she could kiss him.
     "Maddie stop, "Jaze said pulling away from her.
    "I don't like you anymore, you've changed," he said.      You're not the Maddie I once knew," he said.
Then his phone rang.
     "Hello, he said through the phone.
     "Jaze, it's me, James. Jaze where are you, Elsa, is looking for you," he said.
     "Oh, I'll be right there," he said and hugged up.
When Jaze got home he saw Elsa on the couch crying.
     "Jaze, where have you been?" his brother asked.
     "Just somewhere," he replied.
     "Elsa I have something to confess. Maddie kissed me," he then said.
     "So did you kiss her back?"
     "No, I did not because I know that you'll be hurt," he said.
     "James, leave us, "Jaze said.
      "Okay," he said and went to his room.
      "Elsa, what's the matter sweetie," he asked. Why are you crying he said wiping the tears off of my face.
     "Jaze, "I started.
     "What is it?" he asked.
     "Jaze, I'm sorry, but I'm breaking up with you, she said with her voice cracking. It's not you it's me I cannot love you the way you used to love me, "I said and took off the necklace and handed it to him. I'm sorry," she said her eyes looking downcast and I can see tears falling from her beautiful blue eyes.
     "Don't cry and don't be sorry it's not your fault you cannot love me. And I knew it from the start when you told me, but you have loved me anyway and that's enough for me."He said
Cupping my face and wipe my tears away.
     "Jaze, "I said and looked into his eyes. "Goodbye Jaze my love," I said and cried.
     "Hey, Elsa what about one last goodbye kiss before you go," he said.
     "Okay," I said and agreed to it.
So he came close to me and closed the gap between us by gently placing his lips on mine and kissed me. Minutes later he pulled away.
     "So this is goodbye," he said saddening.
     "No, this is not we'll see each other again," I said.
      "I hope so because I'm going to miss you so badly my love," he said and kissed my lips.
     "Me too, Jaze, I'm going to miss you, "I said.

I went home crying. Because I broke up with him. Because I love him.

1 month later≈

After I broke up with Jaze I was more hurt than before because he loves and understands me in a deep manner only he and I could understand. Every day my heart hurts because I thought of him. Every day I have a sleepless night thinking about him and I know its not my fault I cannot love him like the way he used to love me but I had already loved him and he remains here in my heart and that will never change he still in my mind. I was more hurt when he left because he loves me more than anything.
I miss him, she said and cried. I miss him so much. Every day of my life is meaningless without him. Every day I thought about him and I feel so sad that I was alone without him by my side. I was lost and I cried and cried all night because I regret that I let him go because he loves me for who I am. I wonder what is he doing right now.

After Elsa broke up with me, I feel sad because I truly love her and understood her and I gave my all just to love her. But I also understand that she doesn't love me she told me from the start that she isn't ready for another relationship even she didn't tell I can tell but I told her to let me just love her and she agreed to that. I accepted her even though she doesn't love me, I let her go because I know she cannot truly be happy with me because she still loves him but he doesn't love her, he has hurt once. He can do it again. I have been in my room for days when I'm hungry I eat some pizza in the fridge, without her I don't feel like eating because every time I eat I thought of her. I really really miss her, her voice her soft hair her beautiful face everything about her. I miss her so much. I know what if I call her.
I picked up my phone from my bedside table and looked at her number. He was thinking if he should call her. Maybe she needs some more space and time to think about it, to think about me and reconsider. But. Its been two years already Maybe she's alright now.

     "Okay I'm ready to love again I will not be scared anymore because someone is loving me truly and he honestly has helped me get over my first love who had hurt me so much, But I can't deny that whenever I hear his name it still hurts. But I have to let go because if I keep holding on, I will suffer because he loves himself more than me. But okay, I will still allow him to be a part of my life. I will allow him again to love me again. Let's see, because I already moved on and I decided to not love him anymore because if I did I'll be hurt all over again. But okay let's give him one last chance.
Let's see if I will fall for him again."
Then my phone rang and I answered it by saying:
     "Hello," I said through the phone.
I heard a voice I taught I'd never hear again.
     "Elsa," Jack said.
     "What is it Jack why did you called.
     "Please accept me again into your life, please I can't live without you," he said.
     "Okay, I was about to that anyway, "I said and hung up.

I will give Jack a chance to love me again because I know I still love him but I'm scared to be hurt again. But if he hurts again, I will go back to the man who loves me more than anything. "Jaze,"