trashmouth [r. tozier]

N I N E T E E N

Chapter song: She will be loved by Maroon 5

RYAN GRIPPED the strap of her backpack tightly as her legs trudged on the dirty sidewalk. Her eyes followed each and every crack the sidewalk had, making sure not to step on one.

Letting out a sigh, Ryan lifted her head to look around the neighborhood she was in. Small suburban houses filled the torn up grassy yards. Most houses had their blinds down, making in interior dark. She bit down on her lip out of stress.

"Well shit," Ryan mumbled and twisted in a circle. She realized soon enough that she was lost. Her dirty converse carried on anyway, and her eyes never left her surroundings.

Cotton candy skies stared to spill out all over, indicating that dawn had arrived. Ryan didn't know how long she had been walking but she knew the sun rose earlier in the end of spring. It couldn't have been too early. What she did know was that her feet ached from having low support from her sneakers.

Shaking her head slightly at her inner thoughts, Ryan stop walking. A very familiar blue car popped into her vision. A hopeful grin snuck upon her lips.

Ryan felt her feet slap against the concrete, picking up their speed. The world around her swished past, as if they're only there for a short moment.

Running past his car, Ryan found herself on his door step. The door had various slashes in it, most likely from a knife. Also most of the grass in the yard had gone yellow, mixed with brown.

Without hesitation, Ryan brought her knuckles up to knock on the door. Slapping her fist on the heavy door three times, she waited for a response.
After a few minutes, Ryan heard shuffling in the house, and a few groans about the time. Finally the door opened to reveal a very tired, and shirtless Henry.

"Listen get lost or ill- Ryan?" His voice soften around her name.

"Hi," She whispered out.

"It's early, what are you doin here?" His southern accent coated his words well.

"Well it's a long story..." Ryan muttered out and shifted all of her weight onto her left leg.

Henry peaked his head out of the door, concern written all over. Taking his bottom lip between his teeth, he simply nodded.

"Come in."

Ryan glided into his house, looking around as she did. There was a grey couch with a black blanket aimlessly thrown on it. A few photos scattered across the walls, and drawings that seemed belong to a child.

"Sorry about the mess, I wasn't expecting no body," Henry mumbled, scratching the back of his neck.

"It's okay."

Ryan watched as Henry wandered into the kitchen and shuffled around for a bit. He returned with a glass of coffee in one hand and a beer in the other.

"I don't know how you like ya coffee, so I made it black with some milk," He sighed and slid into the couch next to Ryan.

"Thank you," She smiled out, taking the warm mug from his hands.

"So you want to explain why ya showed up at my doorstep?" He sighed, and hitting the cap of his beer bottle off using a knife.

"Long story short, Richie's in a coma, he has been for about a month and half now. and it's all my fault. That's why I haven't been in school much. we were with him all night last night until Eddie told me that I'd be staying at his house that night, since I obviously can't go home. So we went to his house and you know tried to go to bed-" Ryan rambled on and breaking eye contact. She didn't really know if her story was making sense, but she didn't care.

"That seems normal?" Henry laughed and Ryan slapped his forearm rolling her eyes.

"I'm not done, then Eddie told me that it was my fault that he's in love with me and kissed me. Even thought he knows how I feel about Richie. I told him I was still in love with him. I don't want to be a cheater Henry I'm scared and sad and mad and-" Ryan's vocal cords tuned out as she looked back up at the older boy.

"Well that wasn't your fault Ryan, he did that. You were just there," He tried to calm her down. Ryan sighed and flopped down on the couch, laying down.

She suddenly felt her body being lifted up and moved. Henry soon placed Ryan on his lap and tangled his hands in her hair. He picked up small strands and started to play with them. Braiding them and such. Ryan's mind was racing but the action made it pause. She took a moment to enjoy the soothing action, and she took a deep breath.

"Henry?" Ryan asked, still surprised at his gentleness.

"Sorry, my mom used to do this to me when I was upset," He let out a throaty laugh and smiled.

"It's fine, it's calming thank you," Ryan breathed out and stared at the boy above her, well tried at least.

"Ryan?" He asked after a few moments of silence.

"Mhmm?" She hummed out.

"I'm sorry," Henry whispered, uncertainty filled his voice.

"For?" Ryan lightly chuckled.

"The ways I've treated you, calling you names or touching your thighs. I'm sorry. I do that to most girls, but turns out, you're not most girls," Henry spat out quickly. Ryan crawled off of his lap and twisted her upper body to face him.

"It's okay Henry, I knew that was just a normal thang with you," She grinned.

"Well I mean I see you more of a little sister anyway, feel the need to protect you," Henry smiled out and took a swig of his beer.

"Well thank you," She mumbled out and laid back down.

She started to think of Richie. The poor heart broken boy that finally was happy. The boy whom never got loved at home and had to act out to get the attention he needed. All he needed was love, that's where Ryan came in, a broken girl that got love at home in a different way. So she acted out at school to forget what happens at home.

A broken boy, for a broken girl.

"Henry?" Ryan murmured out, and casually let her eyes close.

"Ya Ry?" He smiled at his new nickname.

"Will you drive me to see Richie? I don't know how long I've got left with him," Ryan sighed and felt the older boy shift underneath her.

Ryan sat up, letting Henry stand up off of the coach. He walked over to a laundry basket and grabbed a red muscle tee. Throwing it over his head, he shoved his hand into his pocket. Ryan heard the jingle of keys and she jumped up from her place on the couch.

"Come on," Henry said, waiting for Ryan. He stuck out his hand and dragged her out of the house.

he apart of the many people who made Ryan feel like she had family.