Secrets

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We arrived in Toronto around 7pm that night. I had just woken up not too long ago and it was already night, it might've just been the fact that I had slept awhile too. Many fans crowded around the jet as we landed which made the situation quite chaotic. Everyone had to pack themselves tightly into each vehicle as we rode to the hotel which was pretty far from the airport. A few hours into the tour and I'm already wanting to go home. All of this was a new experience for me and I honestly didn't know how to handle all of the schedules that we were on, along with different time zones. I still didn't understand how Michael handled all of this.

...

We all settled into are rooms and had a quick meeting before being dismissed to our rooms. I took a shower to cleanse myself from my long day of constant traveling and settled into a pair of shorts and an oversized Brooklyn sweatshirt I had received as a gift one year from one of my students. As I was about to call Michael before going to bed, there was a knock on the door that interrupted my chance of doing just that. When I answered the door, I was surprised to see who had visited me at such an hour.

"Whitney? Come in, come in. What are you doing here so late?" I looked at Whitney who had already prepared herself for bed.

"I just wanted to check in to see how you were adjusting to everything. I saw how uncomfortable you were while we were on the plane ride." Her and I sat down as we talked.

"I guess I'm doing okay, this is all a huge adjustment for me so I'm still trying to eat used to it." I said.

"Well I know it can be uncomfortable when you're around people you don't know. I apologize for my little entourage for being so rude today, I felt really bad and I just wanted to come here and apologize face to face." I waved my hand at her.

"It's okay, it wasn't that big of a deal. Plus, I'm used to it anyways so it doesn't come at a surprise." I rubbed my arms uncomfortably.

"Anna is everything okay? You seem sad." She examined me as I shook my head.

"No, I'm okay." I lied.

"Anna, I want to believe you but I can't. Something is up and I just want you to know that I'm here for you." I watched as her eyes traveled down to my arms. I looked down to see that my sweatshirt had rolled up, leaving enough cleavage to show my shame that had been marked on me. Whitney rushed over and grabbed my wrist and pushed my sleeve up.

"Anna! What did you do?" She said half concerned, half angry.

"It's nothing." I tried to tear myself away from her grasp but she held my wrist tight.

"Anna you need to tell me right now! What is going on? And I'm not going to ask again." I gulped as tears welled in my eyes.

"I-I don't know Whitney. It's just really hard to explain since no one can really relate." I looked away to hide my tears. Whitney turned my face towards her as she wiped away my tears with her thumb.

"Anna, please tell me. I'm really worried about you right now." I sighed as I turned to her.

"When I left Michael a few years ago, I was broken because he had been the only true friend I had ever had. The day I left he had told me that he loved me and when I left, I was completely broken from the inside out. Not too long after I went back to school, my parents had died in a car wreck and I lost it. I had isolated myself from everyone and just couldn't handle life anymore. That's when this started and many other problems had occurred that I had never told Michael about. I'm ashamed of what I did and what I've done to myself and I can never forgive myself. I would prefer if Michael never knew about this, God knows what he would do." I sniffles as I finished my disastrous story. Whitney had tears streaming down her face as well.

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