Can We Walk Together? (Peterick au)

Chapter 20

*Patrick's POV*

They had a lovely day at the zoo. They fed the wallabies, watched a bird show and sat in front of the white tiger enclosure as they ate ice cream. All the while watching them dive in the water from time to time to cool off.  After a few hours his headache started acting up again, despite the painkiller he took a little hour ago. He didn't tell Pete. Knowing he'd worry, but the black haired boy noticed anyway. "Let's go home." He said, but Patrick shook his head. They hadn't seen the pandas yet. After some pleading, Pete eventually gave in. All be it hesitantly. Patrick knows that Pete was right to be so careful, but he really wanted to see the pandas. Afterwards they went straight home and Patrick didn't complain once, because his head was already killing him. He closed his eyes the entire ride home to let them rest. His head hurt like hell, though the pain wasn't by far as bad as when he got rushed to the hospital. That didn't mean it couldn't hurt like a bitch though. When they came home he went to his room to lay in the dark for a few hours. He figured it's probably because of the over sensitivity. The pain indeed ebbed away after a while and he went back to the living room. A now relieved Pete gave him a hug and wanted to start dinner for the two of them. Joe was still at Marie's grandparents to have dinner there as well. He just opened the freezer to see what they could eat when Patrick's phone rang. His mom called to ask if they want to have dinner at theirs. Both boys said yes to the offer and they had a great meal with an occasional embarrassing story about Patrick when he used to be little.

//

The next day Patrick wanted to go to work already since he doesn't have to lay down this time. But no one, including his own boss, would let him. Turns out they were right to do so. Even when he stayed home he regularly got headaches and his eye would start aching and stinging from time to time, causing him to involuntary cry without sobs. The professor warned him about it all, he even said that he'll probably have to stay home longer than the previous time. Patrick hates that he's right. He stayed home for a whole week like the previous time, but when his checkup came around the corner, the professor ordered him to stay home for another one. Patrick did his complaining, but knows he can't do anything about it. His headaches still haven't gotten better because the pressure in his eye still isn't exactly what it should be. He's not in danger anymore, but most headaches could've been avoided if it would just stay as it should be. Eventually it did get a little better, making him able to work half days. Either in the morning or in the afternoon. It's not great, but it is better than no days at all. This went on for another two weeks and Patrick's immensely grateful for how understanding his boss and colleagues are. This week though, he can finally work normal hours again. It's quite hard on him, he has to take painkillers every four hours and they don't always work. Whenever he gets tired, a black circle starts closing in on him from the right with white shapes flashing like when you rub your eyes too roughly or look in a million flashing cameras. He even has new friends, who never leave his sight. Literally. The cataract came through like the doctor predicted and small black/gray spheres are following his every eye movement. Making it hard to see, which was already pretty bad, or to concentrate at times. When he comes home after work, he has to lay in his dark room for a while to let his eyes rest before he can do anything else even if it's just to watch television. At the store he works as good as possible, but he barely ever looks up at costumers when he's behind the cash register. This causes a lot of people to think he's rude, but in reality he's just too ashamed of the way his eye looks. Both Pete and his parents told him that you can't really see it if you don't know about it. What they really mean is that you get used to it after a while. They might not even realize, but he knows that's what's really going on. He can see the way people look at him or ask questions.  He's pretty sure that everything that could've gone wrong or still can go wrong, has happened or will inevitably happen. Today it's Friday and for some reason his boss gave him a free day. He says for some reason, but he's pretty sure that his boss noticed how hard it still is for him to work full days. He partially wants to complain, but knows it's useless to. Instead he cleaned the apartment in between naps and he's now in the kitchen making dinner. He keeps himself busy to keep his mind off of the train wreck that is his thoughts. He often feels miserable, he wants to scream or cry at certain times. And at other times he wants to do nothing but lay in his bed all day staring at the ceiling as he's filled with unwanted self-pity. Is this what Pete experiences all the time and so much worse? His respect for his boyfriend just multiplied a dozen times. Speaking of his boyfriend, Pete just walks in. "Patrick?" He hears him call out. "Kitchen!" He yells back, not looking up. Two all too familiar arms slip around his waist as Pete gives him a hug from behind. His chin resting on Patrick's shoulder. "What's for dinner?" He asks as he gives a kiss on his shoulder. "Lasagna." Patrick replies with a warm feeling spreading through him. Even after almost three months of being together, his heart still beats faster from every affectionate thing Pete does, including hugs and quick kisses. "You can make lasagna?" Pete asks, pulling back amazed. Patrick turns his head at him. "Yeah, my grandma taught each and every one of our family." He softly smiles, silently thanking his grandma up above. She's been dead for a few years, but he still misses her just as much as the first day. "Teach me!" Pete says excitedly. Patrick chuckles and shows Pete what he's doing.