[Derek]
After Lyiah and Justin left, my mom went to bed. I on the other hand couldn't sleep. And it wasn't because of Drew.
I've been think about the conversation Lyiah and I had. I love Jason. I love both of my Jasons. And I want us all to be together. As a family.
After laying Drew down I walked back downstairs to watch tv or something. Just before I could sit down, the doorbell rang. I groan and drag myself to open the door. When I opened it, there stood Jason.
"H-hi." He croaks.
"Hi..." I say moving to let him in.
"Where's Drew?" He asks as I close the door.
"He's sleeping right now. My mom is too." I say walking past him to the living room.
"D-Derek wait." He rasps, stopping me in my tracks. I close my eyes, already knowing what he wanted.
"W-why can't you say it?" He asks.
"S-say w-what?" I ask.
"Say... T-that you love me." He croaks.
I knew it.
"What makes you think-"
"Cut the bullshit Derek." He snaps.
My heart jumps a little at his tone. "Excuse me?" I say turning to face him.
"You can't say it. You can't say you love me and I wanna know why." His voice fragile but firm at the same time. He walks up closer to me making me back up just a little. He could see the fear in my eyes and it was slowly breaking him.
"D-Derek I-"
"You cheated on me. And even though it's been four weeks, I can't stop thinking about it. It's burned into my brain. So forgive me if I can't say those words whole heartedly." I sniffle.
He lowers his head, sniffling. "Y-you d-don't love m-me anymore?"
"Of course I do. It's just... It's hard to say right now." I reassure him.
He looks up at me. "A-are you still going to visit Chris?"
"Um... I'm not sure yet." I stammer.
"D-do you want to?" He asks looking at me up and down.
"Yes.... And no." I sigh. He furrows his eyebrows.
"Wha-"
"I can't explain. It's just... I want to see him. And I want to get some type of closure. But then again. I really see no need to go."
"Oh." He says, stepping back a few feet. His hands jamming into his pockets.
"Um... You hungry?" I ask.
"Nah. I'm fine." He says.
"You sure? I cooked some cookies." I say smiling a little. His head pops up.
"My favorite?" He asks.
"Your favorite." I smile. "C'mon."
We walk into the kitchen, him trailing behind me as I grab the cookies out the oven.
"Here you go." I say in a happy tone. He smiles taking one and popping it into his mouth, moaning in satisfaction.
"Um... Jason? How did you figure out what you wanted to go to school for?" I ask.
"Well... It took me a while. But I guess I had to figure out what I was good at. Which is making stuff."
"Oh." I say.
"Why'd you ask?"
"I'm not sure what I want to do when I graduate." I mumble looking at my hands.
"Well what do like to do?"
"Hum... Well... I draw sometimes... And I use to take painting classes when I was younger."
"Do you still draw?" He asks.
"Sometimes when Drew's asleep. I take pics too."
"I didn't know that." He says lowly.
"A lot of people don't."
"Did you take pics of me?" He smirks.
"Mm... A couple." I smirk.
"Mm hum." He says.
"So... You wanna watch a movie or something? It's still early."
"Yeah. Sure." He smiles. Suddenly I hear Drew crying in his crib.
"Well... Our prince has awakened." I sigh.
"Can I get him?" He asks.
"Uh... Sure. Go ahead." I say. He walks upstairs to my room. I walk into the living room, sitting on the couch and turning on the tv.
"Here he is." Jason says holding Drew facing my way. His eyes were wide open but no tears.
"Hi hunny bun." I coo as Jason sits on the couch beside me.
"Does he know who I am?" Jason asks as he holds Drew on his lap.
"Of course. He looks like you." I giggle.
"Yeah... He does." Jason giggles.
I sit and watch as Jason gives Drew all of his attention. It was honestly the cutest thing I'd ever seen. I felt very fortunate that Jason wanted to be in his sons life. Unlike my father.
"Derek? You okay?" Jason asks.
"Um... Y-yeah. I'm fine." I say clearing my throat.
Maybe that's what I need to do. I need to connect with my father somehow. And then it'll make it easier for me to connect with Jason and fix our relationship. I should talk to Lyiah about this first.
But I feel so right about this.
(A/n: ugh!
I'm so mentally exhausted.
I have soooo many freaking ideas for my other stories and this. And I'm so glad they have clashed or anything.
For Autism readers, I'll update as soon as I can. I'm trying to figure out which plot twist to use first.
Secondly, if you want to know when I'm updating what story, tweet me. My twitter is iamjourneygrace.
If there's a story you'd like me to update. Tweet me. I don't mind.
If there's a story you want me to read, tweet me.
I love you guys from the bottom of my heart.
You are my Gracies!!!!
Love you for reading 😘🌺)
