Just Monika

Another Goodbye?

"We're gonna get you through this." I hugged her. "We'll stick together."

She started to tear up. "Danny, your hugs, I can't feel them."

I hugged her tighter. "I love you, Monika. I know you can't feel my hugs, but I want you to feel the love."

She hugged me. "I love you too, Danny."

We just lied there. I didn't want to leave her alone. Who knows how much time I'd have left with her?

I couldn't fall asleep, either. I wanted to be awake while I lied next to my darling Monika.

About twenty minutes later, Keith knocked on the door. Well I assumed it was Keith, since he was the only other person in the apartment.

"Hey Danny."

Yeah, it was Keith.

"Come in," I said

He slowly walked in. "Danny, my computers doing something and I think you might wanna see it."

"Not now Keith. I need to stay with Monika right now," I said.

"I think it might have something to do with her, though."

I sat up. "Okay, let me take a look." I looked at Monika. "Monika, I'll be right back."

I followed Keith to his room. As soon as I entered, I saw a familiar sight. Keith's computer was doing exactly what it did before Monika came out of it. It looked like a whirlpool.

"Keith, what did you do?"

"I didn't do anything. It just suddenly turned on while I was watching TV. What do you think it is?"

"I'm not sure, but I think I have a theory."

I headed back downstairs to where Monika was at. I approached her so that I could tell her about the computer.

"Monika, do you remember when you came out of the computer?"

She looked at me. "Yes, I remember."

"The computer is doing some weird thing like it did when you were coming out of the it. Maybe if I shut it off, it'll be able-"

Her eyes widened through her weak expression. "Don't shut off the computer."

"But I think it's trying to take you back. If I can stop it, maybe I'll be able to keep you here."

She sighed. "Danny, I think you're right about it trying to take me back, but I don't think it's the reason that I feel the way I do now. I don't belong in this world, Danny. I don't belong in your reality."

"But maybe we could try it. If it works, you could be here with me, and we could live happily together."

"Danny, I don't think that's how it works. I don't belong here. I'm not a normal person. I eat because I want to, I don't feel hunger. The emotions I'm feeling are artificial. Our love probably isn't even real..."

"Don't say that Monika. You may be made of programming, but our love is real. Your emotions are there, I can see them. I can feel them. They're as real as you and I."

"But Danny, I-"

"I won't shut off the computer. If it does take you, then you'll probably be a lot safer and healthier there than you are here. We'll find a way to stay together. I love you Monika, and I'd do anything to be with you."

"I love you too, Danny."

I lied down next to her and hugged her. This was such an odd situation, I wasn't really sure what else to do.

"Hey Monika. I don't know if I ever told you that I was writing a story about us?"

"My memories kind of fuzzy at the moment. Could you tell me about it again?"

"Well, how about I read it to you instead?"

Even though she looked weak, I could see that her smile was genuine.

"That'd be nice."

Maybe this wasn't the best thing to do. Was it a waste of time to read her a story that I had been writing about us? Or was it the perfect use of it?

"Alright cool. I'll go ahead and read it to you."

I read her the story I called, "Just Monika." It wasn't complete yet, but it was almost there. I tried to make it as accurate as possible to the events that happened with us, but I did add a few things here and there.

(Things that you guys didn't read)

After I finished reading it, Monika seemed a little confused.

"It ends there," she asked.

The version I had her read only reached the part where she "died." I was too depressed to continue, and just ended up forgetting about it until now.

"Well, I did planned on continuing it later, but a lot of things had been going on, so I got distracted. Did you like it?"

"Yeah, it was really nice. It actually seems accurate to what's been going on with us. Well mostly accurate." She let out a weak giggle. "I don't ever recall you getting a pistol."

"Ah well, I just wanted to make it a little more exciting."

"Well it worked. I really liked it."

"I'm glad you did." I checked the time. "It's barely six, is there anything else you wanna do?"

"Ah well, I really don't think I have any energy to do anything."

"It's okay, we can just lie here together." I hugged her. "I love you Monika."

"I love you too, Danny."

We lied in bed with each other. With each passing minute, I could only guess that Monika would soon be gone. What was I to do when that happened? I'd have to do anything in my power to help her get better, and hopefully keep her here.

I lied next to her, but I didn't allow myself to fall asleep. I stayed awake and thought about it all. What could I do? It seemed the only options were that she dies here, or she gets taken back into her world, where we can no longer be together. Well maybe I could find a way to make it work. Nonetheless, it wouldn't be as nice as having her here with me. It would probably just be like having Monika After Story. She probably wouldn't even be able to speak freely.

Ah, but I guess we'll see.