Blank Canvas

Chapter 9

~A few days later~

     Jungkook smiled to himself as he pulled out the small leather notebook once again, filling it out.

Day 11
Breakfast: Nothing
Lunch: Nothing
Dinner: Nothing
Snacks: Nothing
Beverages: Water

      You're doing so well, Jungkook.

      The voice was back again. At first Jungkook thought that he was going crazy, and considered seeing a doctor until the voice started to be helpful.

     The voice told him when to go to the gym, and how long to work out for. The advise was usually extreme, but Jungkook had learned that the suggestions worked.

     And so, he listened.

………………………………………………

     After a few hours at the gym this morning and a five mile run, the maknae walked into the dorm on the other members having breakfast.

      "Good morning, hyungs." He said tiredly, immediately getting ready to head up to his room once more. "Wait, Kookie. Come eat breakfast with us!" Jin said quite sternly. "Lately you haven't been spending any time with us!" He pouted, motioning for the maknae to come over and sit next to him.

    "Is it really a bad thing that he hasn't been spending time with us?" Jimin commented rudely. "Yeah, I mean we've actually been able to get things done without him bugging us all the time." Tae agreed.

      Jungkook froze when he heard this.

     Jin gasped, anger immediately taking over his usually calm demeanor. "How dare you speak to Jungkook that way you pabos! You deserve punishmen..."

     Jin's words faded away, being replaced with the voice.

     See, they don't care about you Jungkook. Nobody does.

     Nobody. That was what Jungkook was most afraid of. Being left completely alone again, no friends or family to love him.

     And it was happening again.

     Jungkook ran up the stairs, desperately trying to run away from the voices screaming in head, repeating the same words over and over.

Ugly.
Useless.
Disgusting.
Untalented.
Fat.
Burden.

     Tears were streaming down his face as the words kept repeating, continually getting louder with every footstep he took.

     Reaching his door, the maknae flung it open and slammed it after him, in hopes of escaping the voices that were following him.

     His attempts were in vain. The voices were full on screaming now, trying to rip his skull apart with the harsh words.

     Jungkook couldn't think straight any more, he only wanted the voices to go away. To any other person on the room, it looked like he was swaying like a drunk, but to him, it was pain.

     The room was spinning now, black clouding his vision as the voices continued to scream.

     Then, suddenly it stopped.

     It was as if time suddenly stood still, all the voices in head were silenced, instead filled with a numbing buzz.

.............................................................

     Jungkook looked down at his blood covered fist.