Forgiven (Rizzoli and Isles)

Chapter 13

"He hit you, didn't he?" I asked. "Rob hit you?"

"We have to get out of these wet clothes before we get sick."

"We're in California. It's summer, Maura. It's hot out. Stop deflecting. Answer the question."

"Jane, it doesn't matter..."

"Answer the god damned question, Maura! Did he hit you?"

She sighed.

"It was one time, Jane. It won't happen again." Maura said.

"Why did he hit you? What happened, Maura?" I asked, following her into the house.

"He got angry the other night, that's all."

"I got angry with you too, but I never hit you." I pointed out. "What made him so angry?"

"Jane, I really don't think you want to know that." Maura said, stripping down from her soaking wet clothes, until she was, in fact, nude.

I did the same.

"No, I really think I do." I said stepping closer to her.

"I told him I didn't want to have sex with him. He kept pushing the issue. I told him to knock it off and he wouldn't. I threatened to come home and he lost it, okay? Are you happy now?"

"You have bruises on your sides too, and your legs. Did he force you to have sex with him?"

"No, Jane! He can just be a little rough sometimes."

"Maura, we were rough. I've never seen bruises like that on you after a night of rough sex."

Maura shook her head.

"I'm going to take a shower. Come with me?" She asked.

I followed her.

We stepped into the shower and our bodies intertwined immediately.

I kissed every bruise on her body. From her head to her toes. We bathed, but then we let the hot water run over us. Maura got tired of standing, so she turned the shower part off and plugged the bathtub. She put bubbles in it. She sunk into the steaming water. I was about to leave the bathroom when I felt her hand around my wrist.

"Stay. Please?" She asked.

I nodded and dropped the towel. I stepped in the tub and sunk behind her. She leaned against me.

"Do you forgive me, Jane? For cheating on you?"

"I forgave you a long long time ago." I said. "Do you forgive me for being an assface and asking for a divorce instead of going to marriage counseling?"

She was quiet for a few moments. I wrapped my arms around her and took her hands in mine.

"You are forgiven, but..."

"But what?" I asked.

"I'm still going to marry him." She stated.

I pushed her away from me and without a word I stood and left the bathroom. I pulled my hair into a ponytail, and put a pair of my sweatpants and the BPD T-shirt I left there on and climbed into Maura's bed.

I heard her stop in the bathroom doorway. She walked over to the bed and slowly climbed in beside me.

"I thought we would never go to bed angry?" She reminded.

"That was when we were married. That rule doesn't apply anymore."

"Jane, Please look at me?"

I turned over. Maura was wearing a white silk robe and her wet hair was dripping onto her pillow.

"How can you do that?" I asked.

"Do what?"

"Go back to him, after he beat on you. How could you kiss me, shower with me, and then ask me to sit, naked, in a bathtub with you and then tell me you are still going to marry that asshole?"

"I love him, Jane. He won't beat on me anymore either. It was one time and he apologized as soon as he did it."

"He'll do it again." I said turning back over. "And when he does you're going to call me and I'm going to kill him."

"Jane, don't joke like that." Maura whined.

"I'm not joking, Maura. If he ever lays a hand on you again, I will kill him. No one ever hurts the people I love. I don't care if he is the governor of Massachusetts or a homeless man on the street. He hurts you, I kill him." I said, getting up and walking downstairs.

"Where are you going?" I heard Maura yell.

"To the couch, it would be wrong of me to sleep beside my naked ex-wife." I snapped.

I flopped onto the couch and stared at the ceiling.

I heard Maura come down the stairs and reach into her downstairs hall closet.

I felt a blanket fall over me, and a kiss on my forehead.

"Sleep well, love." Maura whispered and stood up straight.

"You can't do that, Maura!" I said.

"What, Jane?"

I sat up.

"That! You can't call me love! You don't get to do that!"

"Why not? You did! That night I got drunk, you carried me upstairs and you kissed my forehead and said 'Goodnight, love.' and-"

"That's not the same!" I yelled.

"How is it not the same?" She yelled back.

"You weren't  engaged and I wasn't really seeing anyone!"

"You were with Melissa! You we're having sex with her, loving her and you called me love."

"I was never going to marry her!" I shouted.

Maura was quiet.

"What Melissa and I had, it wasn't long term. We both knew that as soon as I moved out here. So, it became more like playing house than an actual relationship. We had fun and I did care about her, but you are my love. My only love. So, I can say that. You can't. You can't because I'm not your only love." I said.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize you felt that way." She said quietly.

"Well I do." I whispered.

Maura walked over and straddled me.

"Please come sleep next to me?" She asked.

"I can't. You're engaged."

Maura started to reply.

"Yes but, the couch will hurt your back."

"Why are you on me, then?"

"Because you listen better when I'm this close."

She's totally right.

"Fine." I groaned and followed her up the steps.

"Just so you know..." Maura said. "I love him, but you are my love."