Life is Liz (LiL, #1)

Chapter 63: Ignorance

He exhaled, loudly, deeply. "That's it?"

"Yeah, yeah, that's it." I nodded. "So, no there's nothing going on between me and him. I've told you before."

"I know." His gaze trailed down to his shoes. "I still don't like him." I opened my mouth, ready to speak but he continued. "Aaand I still don't trust him." He looked at me then, eyes set in stone, and I knew that this would build up to a fight. "And I still don't want you near him."

Not this again!

I shook my head, ran a hand over my features and sighed in exhaustion. "Sam, don't do this. Please." I'd begged him once before, but I wasn't going to stoop so low today I would simply ask this of him in as calm a voice as I could manage and the rest lay with him. "We've gone through this before."

"Yes, we have," he affirmed, features taut. "And we've not come to a conclusion."

"You apologized," I reminded him. "You said you didn't mean it. You reassured me that you were working on your jealousy and that you had it under control for the time being-"

"Yeah, well, I said that, but I didn't mean any of it."

"What?"

"I lied, Liz!"

"Why?"

"Because I won't ever accept him! I can't change how I feel about him, Liz. It's not that fucking easy! You might be too freaking naive to see it, but he's using you." Oh, I was aware of this alright. Him calling me naive grated on my nerves though.

"Yeah? I might be naive, but your distrust is what's leading us to this argument all the time!"

"I have a right to be suspicious! Honey, you can believe me when I say that he wants me as much out of your life as I want him to be." I'd never heard an endearment be voiced in such a condescending way before. It made my fingers twitch in irritation.

"I wasn't talking about your distrust towards Ryan, honey." Time and time again he proved that he didn't have any faith in me keeping my hands to myself where Ryan was concerned.

"It's hard to trust you when everywhere you go a bunch of jocks are following you around!"

I gaped at him. Now, he didn't just have issues about my friendship with Ryan, but with the rest of my friends too and probably also with me coaching the team.

This conversation was getting out of hand. I knew I had to stop this now to prevent either of us from saying something we'd regret later on.

"Sam? Please stop. I can't fight with you about this any longer.." I plopped down on the couch, feeling drained.

A burning flame of anger sizzled in his eyes as he threw his hands up in frustration. "No! We'll talk about this now. I'm sick of you always ending our arguments before they are over!"

My forehead fell into my hand. Why couldn't he understand that I was trying to keep us safe from irreparable damage? If this went on the way it had started then we might come to a point either of us couldn't come back from.

But was that really what I was trying to do or was I just doing what I was always itching for when things got chaotic?

"Alright. I'm listening." I sighed but stayed seated. "So, it's not just Ryan." It should be a question, but the answer was obvious.

"No," he said, voice calmer. "It's not just Ryan."

"I give up. I might see where you're coming from with Ryan. But the others? Logan, Jack, Tony, heck, I thought you liked them, I thought you were friends!"