There's A Reason... That Shit Didn't Work Out

FOUR

The man knelt down to pick up Joie's notebook at the very same time she did and their heads collided.

"Fuck!" she shouted as pain shook her brain. Her eyes closed as she pulled back.

"I'm so sorry, Joy," he said quickly.

She opened her eyes seeing him holding her notebook right before her face. She glanced up at him quickly then snatched it from him forcefully. Her mouth vocalized her immediate thought. "Well, if there's one thing you're good at, it's causing me pain." She rubbed her head slowly.

"I suppose I deserve that," he said bashfully.

She looked up, brow furrowed and eyes squinting. "What are you doing here? I thought you moved to Idaho or Iowa or something."

He shifted his weight. "Utah. I live in Utah now."

Joie mumbled to herself. "I knew it was one of those stupid vowel-starting states." Memories of her last encounter with him swarmed her and deep anger covered her soul. "Had to move to find new chicks to sleep with since you probably hit all the ones here?" She looked up at him. "Why exactly are you talking to me?"

He stared blankly.

Joie stuffed her notebook in her purse as she said, "I'm not available to fuck currently, or to fuck-over so why don't you just leave me the hell alone."

Jamie leaned into Joie's space and whispered, "Who is that?"

Joie's necked snapped toward her friend. "Sam. That's Sam."

It took a moment for the name to register, but soon Jamie's mouth turned downward. "Sam? As in the Sam?"

Both women looked up at him and he cringed. "I guess my past behavior left a mark."

Joie stood up, Jamie doing the same in support of her friend. Joie said, "Ya think? How many times was it you popped into my life, got sex, then disappeared without a word?"

His lips pressed together for a moment.

"Look, I have more important things to do than to stand here talking to you." She looked him square in the eyes and said, "I'd say it was nice seeing you, but it wasn't. You're an asshole." She turned on her heel with her head held high and began to walk away.

Jamie followed then caught up. "Are you okay?"

"No. I'm not." Quickly Joie realized she was walking away from a moment she had been looking forward to for years. She stopped, turned back around, headed toward him, and began to rant. "Just who do you think you are, Sam Oziv? Acting all nice to me, saying 'hi' like we're old friends? You must be a lot dumber than you look, and trust me, you look like a moron, to think I would be all giddy to talk to you. I know you think you're pretty talented horizontally, but let me tell you, it wasn't that good. Not any where near good enough for me to achieve ass-hat amnesia." 

He took a few steps backwards as she approached him.

She stopped. "Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you?"

After a few moments of silence he finally spoke. "Joy, I have so much to say to you. So much I've always wanted to say but I was afraid if I did, it would do more harm than good. I know I hurt you-"

"Hurt me? I don't think that word appropriately describes what you've done to me. We could get the thesaurus out and use every single synonym and that still wouldn't scratch the surface of the torment you caused in my life."

"I know. Trust me, I know. But can you just calm down? Please? I'm not that young, stupid boy anymore. I've grown up. In many ways."

She looked him over, head to toe. Yes, he looked different. His body had broadened and his face had matured. His jaw line was covered in short, trimmed facial hair.

"You look really great. So beautiful. You've always been beautiful, but wow, the years have been great to you, truly."

She crossed her arms as she calmed slightly. She bobbed her a head slightly trying to figure out how to move forward from this uncomfortable moment.

"Is there any chance we can talk? I mean really talk? I would love the chance to explain some things to you-"

"I don't want to hear your excuses, Sam."

"No, not excuses. I swear. I just-" He paused. "I'd really like a chance to explain why I behaved so badly. It was never because of you. You were damn near perfect and I-" He shook his head. "I was so scared of you. Of what I felt for you. That's why I ran so many times. I was petrified."

"I know, I'm a very scary person." She rolled her eyes.

His face seemed sincere. "It wasn't you're fault. None of it. It was all me." He folded his hands before his chest. "Please, give me a chance to explain. To apologize to you the way you deserve."

Her eyes looked around the park as she thought. "I don't know. I'll think about it."

"I'll be in town for a few more days, so if you want to go get coffee or something, it's on me."

She huffed with a grunt. "That's the least you could do, buy me coffee."

His mouth went to a slightly crooked grin. "Is that a yes?"

"I'll think about it. We've got to go." She turned around and started away again.

She heard him shout: "How can I get ahold of you?"

"I guess if you really want to, you'll  figure it out."