Swan Queen Once Shots

letters to you

Hey, Regina, it's me, Emma. I know it has been a little bit, I'm sorry about that but I have been a little busy with a certain baby. There isn't enough time in the day for that kid I swear, he definitely gets that from you. Not that the other was possible. I got the job as sheriff, it took a bit longer than I expected but you don't get what you want if you don't wait. Sorry, I got a bit off track there, I'm sorry I haven't been able to write you recently. It's not for the lack of thinking about you because believe me I never stop. I think it just hurts too much, I know I know I have to be strong for Henry he needs me but his eyes... god Gina they are so much like yours that it kills me. I know it probably doesn't excite you to know that when I see our son I want to cry but it's true, I want to sob like a little baby. That's okay though because I would never give him up, not in a million years or two. He's a really happy baby, I cry more than him, I'm not kidding I swear. The kid turned 7 months old yesterday, shit 7 months, that's not possible. Don't worry I don't swear in front of him, I remember the rules. I talk about you a lot to him, his smile brightens at your name. I'm not mommy, I'm mama, you will always and forever be mommy for him. I'll teach him all about you and tell him all the secret things you hate, like how you absolutely 'despise' (your words not mine) how I eat ice cream out of the carton.

"Really Emma? Again?" The brunette sighs as she walks in the kitchen with a disapproving look, "we've talked about this."

Emma looks up at Regina and speaks with some ice cream still in her mouth, "No if I remember correctly you talked and I listened." She smirks but that smirk falls away the moment Regina takes the container and spoon from the blonde's hand and walks to a different counter with it. Regina opens the cabinet above the counter she's standing at and grabs a bowl before scooping two scoops into the bowl and sliding that in front of the blonde woman. She then proceeds to put the ice cream container back in the freezer and turns to Emma with an 'I dare you to fight me' face. "It's hard to scoop out of the container," Emma pouts and eats a bite from the bowl.

"You do realize that you are scooping it out of the container when you use the spoon to eat it?" She smiles unwillingly at how cute Emma's pout was, "maybe just ask for help or run it under the water first darling." 

Every time you made me a bowl of ice cream for after work I swear I fell in love with you more and more. I didn't even think it was possible and then there you would go doing something incredibly cheesy and sweet for me. Anyways, god I'm sorry. This is probably going to be the longest I have written you, the other ones were more fun because I got to see your reaction when I was with you or I'd get to feel your kiss or your hug when you got home from work after reading one that day. They were always short and sweet, I love you babe or I miss you already (both of which are accurate in this letter as well). You don't understand how hard it is to have to live life without your best friend, without your true love- god what the fuck Regina I miss you so fucking much just come back! This letter is pointless you aren't going to read it and I am still going to be sitting alone in your office at your desk just waiting for this all to be over and some kind of fucked up nightmare. Why did you have to go and die on me? I told you I wanted to go first but of course you couldn't let that happen. You want to know the reason why I always said that? It was because I'm not strong enough to be without you, I knew you would be. I'm not saying I loved you more than you loved me, just that you have always been a stronger person than I have. You would be able to do it all and forget about yourself just to take care of that sweet boy in the other room, fuck Regina I swear if I screw up our kid. He can't be screwed up, he has your DNA in him. That means he's already the most perfect thing in existence. My parents don't understand, they try to comfort me and tell me that eventually it will get better but they don't get it. No one gets it until it happens to them, I'd like to see my dad survive if my mom ever died- yeah it wouldn't happen. My mom keeps bringing me food, I'm gaining weight maybe I'm lucky you're.... no definitely not lucky. I love you. and I miss you more than you can imagine.

Love always and forever

your wife, Emma.