Swan Queen Once Shots

I Swear I Killed My Ex!

"Gina I did!" Emma said in a huff walking back to where Regina was sitting rather regally on the couch. Her legs were crossed and she was sitting perfectly straight with a glass of wine in her hand. 

The brunette rolls her eyes and takes a sip of her drink, not believing a word her adorably drunk girlfriend is saying. 

"You don't believe me?" She sat on the couch right next to the beautiful mayor and leaned her head on her hand that was propped up on the back of the couch. "I can tell you how I did it, it was messy." She made a scrunched up disgusted face as she shook her head. 

"Yes dear, murder usually is." Regina sighs and turns towards her with an amused smile, "So let me get this straight-"

Emma giggles, "Ha! Straight, you're no where close to being straight. I would know, you just fucked me this morning."

Regina smirked only cringing slightly at the blondes vulgar language. Starting her sentence again hoping the other woman can hold her self together for the sentence. "Let me get this straight, you're trying to convince me that you, the sheriff, murdered someone. Oh wait, not just someone, but your ex girlfriend." She chuckles slightly, "Emma isn't this something you would want to keep a secret and not tell your boss?"

Emma shakes her head with the most serious face, "Nope that's not whats happening Gina! I'm not telling my boss, I'm telling my girlfriend. There is Girlfriend/Girlfriend privileges." She had trouble saying the last word. 

"Emma I am not your lawyer," she chuckles and shakes her head. "Girlfriend/Girlfriend privileges aren't a thing. You just made that up."

Emma gasps in shock, "No! I couldn't just make something up like that Gina! I'm not that smart."

"You are plenty smart," she smiles softly at Emma and pushes some of the blondes falling strands back behind her ear. Emma automatically pressed into her hand with a soft smile causing Regina's heart to swell. 

"I did it though." She opens her eyes and Regina moves her hand back to her lap. 

"Why would you have murdered her, you said it was a mutual break up." Regina leans back into the arm of the chair and lays her feet out on Emma's lap which Emma accepts with out a thought.

"She stole my toaster," Emma shrugs. 

"She stole your toaster so you murdered her," Regina deadpans and Emma nods. 

The blonde looks down at Regina's feet then starts to rub them, even drunk she knows how to take care of her woman. She smirks to herself then looks up remembering that they were having a conversation. "Emotions do weird things and I really liked that toaster, it toasted things for me." 

Regina's head falls back, Emma's foot massages were always the best. When she hears Emma's answer she starts laughing, "Oh did it now? I had no idea."

Emma nods and smiles at Regina, "Yup! So you believe me now?" 

Regina just continues to laugh and sighs happily, "no Emma sorry but I don't."

Emma looked offended and stopped massaging Regina's feet to sit up and cross her arms. "what, why not?"

Standing up the brunette stretches her body a little before turning to the kitchen with her empty glass to put it in the sink. "Because, Emma, I saw Lilly at Granny's last week and she certainly was not murdered." 

Emma just sat there with her mouth hung open for a while before finally closing it and standing up to go after Regina. She walked a little tipsily towards the kitchen and then wrapped her arms around Regina's waist from behind. 

Regina smiles at the movement and continues cleaning her glass as she speaks, "Why did you want me to think you murdered someone again?"

Emma huffs and hides her face into the brunettes back as she mumbled something not quite understandable. 

"I'm sorry, what dear?" 

"I said, you called me cute." She turned Regina so that she could lay her head on the brunette's chest, it's a lot more comfortable than her back. "I'm not cute Gina."

Regina smiles and holds the savior in her arms as she plays with her blonde locks. "No, definitely not my love. You're adorable." She smirks and kisses the top of her head.

Emma scrunches up her nose, "Did I ever tell you about that time I didn't shower for a month?"

Regina rolled her eyes knowing that she was just trying to find a way to make Regina think that she wasn't adorable, too bad that was never going to happen. "No, you've never mentioned it before." Regina was content with holding Emma and letting her tell these stories to try and convince her, as long as she had the savior in her arms she was fine. She'd let Emma in on the secret that she knows shes lying about this as well later.