happier | jikook (hiatus)

nineteen: suicide (Jimin)

I was all alone in my house, ever since Yoongi kissed me. I never got the chance to talk to him because I really hate him for doing that. And nobody had ever kissed me except for Jungkook. Aish, here I go again, thinking about Jungkook.

And that reminds me, ever since I woke up this morning, I had this weird feeling in me. I can't describe what it was but its really weird but I just shook the feeling off by taking a cold shower in the morning.

Also, I got my driver's license yesterday. Cool right? Now I'm going to drive on my own and luckily, my sister left her car on the garage.

Now I am watching television when I heard a sudden loud knock on the door. "What the heck." I looked at the door still lazy to stand up.

Then it repeated a thousand times, "Coming!" I groaned annoyed as I lazily stood up from the couch and walked over to the door. The knocking was continuous, I opened the door, "What is it-" and saw a panting Taehyung.

"What happened to you?" I asked with furrowed eyebrows.

"Ju-Jungkook." He managed to say between breaths

"Jungkook? What about him?" I asked, heart beating faster at what he would say.

"He- he-" he stuttered still catching his breath

"What?! Just tell me!" I exclaimed panicking.

"I think he-he's trying to kill himself. Co-come to his house, now." He managed to say.

"Wha-What? Why didn't you stop him?!" I stuttered, lips trembling. I almost stumbled back while quickly putting my on shoes cause I have my socks on then I put on my sweater.

"He locked himself!"

"That little-" I groaned as I went out of the house frustrated and to my car, I quickly went inside and inserted the keys and the engine roared to life.

"Taehyung! Get on!" I shouted from the window.

"No! You go, I'll be fine here!" He said then I drove as fast as I can.

What is happening? Why would Jungkook be killing himself? I hate this boy, really! Is he depressed again? Ugh.

As I reached his house, I parked my car in front and ran to his house, and luckily the door was open. "Thank you Taehyung." I whispered and ran upstairs.

I miss his home. The ambience its giving. It was always positive, happy and alive, but now, it felt so dark, so lonely.

As I reached Jungkook's room, I turned the doorknob to open it but was unsuccessful to, "Its locked, shit." I cursed as I think of something to try and open the door. I looked around, but no thing can be a tool to open his door.

"What are you doing inside, Jungkook?" I asked like someone will answer. Then I looked up and saw a "Key! Yes!" I said with glee an jumped to reach for it but my height was too short so I took a chair that was on the balcony and reached for it.

I immediately opened the door and there was smoke. I opened all the windows that is found inside Jungkook's room and opened the fan so the smoke will come out.

Then I saw the bathroom door open and saw smoke coming out from it. And saw Jungkook standing there. I coughed as I reached for Jungkook's hand to pull him out of their.

"Jungkook?! What are you trying to do?!" I asked in a loud voice, his face was shook. Eyes widened and mouth a little agape. Then I sat him down his bed and kneeled in front of him. "Jimin." He managed to say.

Oh his voice. How I miss those deep, hoarse voice that always turns me on every morning when I wake up greeting me.

"Wha-What are you doing h-here?" He stuttered looking directly into my eyes.

"I came here to see you because you were trying to kill yourself." He widened his eyes at my statement.

"H-how did you-"

"It doesn't matter. All I want to know is, why? Why are you trying to kill yourself, Jungkook?" I waited for 10 minutes, repeating the question just to make him talk but I failed. We just sat there in silence.

"If you don't want to answer then fine. I'll be going now." I stood up an walked over to the door thinking it would change his mind to tell me what was the reason behind his suicide attempt.

"I was depressed." I stopped. I turned my back and walked back to him as I kneeled down in front of him again.

"I was depressed because I still love you and want you back." He cried.

"Fucking tears!"

"Stop. Just let it out. It won't stop unless you let it all out." Then I hugged him and he hugged me back scratching the fabric of the sweater I have been wearing ever since I got here. But I ignored it because I also missed his touch. His scent. All of him. I just miss him so much and I cried with him.

After a while he fell asleep. Probably exhausted from crying because I can still hear his hiccups.

And for a moment I stared at his wonderful features, thinking 'will I be yours again?' I looked at his face, red eyes, swollen lips and wet cheeks yet still so full of beauty. I dried his tears with my hands.

Then a small smile crept on my face as I stared at him fondly. Oh, how I admired those features only he had.

And after a few more minutes, I stood up from the bed and placed my forehead on his as I whispered the words, "I love you, Jungkook." To him

"So much that it's killing me." I continued, "But I can't come back to you now, I'm mo-moving away soon and you might not see me a-again." Then I kissed Jungkook on the forehead then lastly on his lips as a tear fell from my eyes.

Then I left the house without even saying my last goodbye to him.

End of flashbacks.

I kept changing chapter titles im sorry y'all 😂

- fluffynim