The Other Side of Me

Chapter 25

-ELEANOR-

I woke up with a headache,with Louis' arm wrapped around me...I have clothes on me,but not the ones that I wore yesterday.My head's pounding and I feel like a bile's rising up.I removed Louis' heavy arm for me to move freely.

I went out of my room to see Harry still sleeping...Fuck,there's so many cigarette butts on the floor.I have to clean this later.

"Pepper!Don't eat that!" I grabbed my dog who was about to eat a something unidentifiable on the floow,I can't remember what happened last night.All I remember was me laughing about something.

I went to the couch,where Harry was sleeping. I nudged him until he wakes up. "Fucker,wake up...wake the fuck up" I said to him.He just groaned and pulled the blanket up so he can cover his face.I smacked him so he'll be awake.

I went back to my room waking Louis up. "Lou.please wake up.Louis..." but he didn't even moved,I checked his pulse to see if he's sill alive.I'm glad that he is.

I checked my phone. there are 34 messages, all from Zayn.

i'm not going till you open this door.

Once I read that,I rushed through the door.to check if Zayn's there...He's sleeping on the fucking mat,his coat was wrapped around him. "Fuck!what the hell are you doing?It's freezing cold outside!" I yelled at him,he doesn't even care.

"My head hurts" he groaned,I helped him get up so he can lie down the sofa beside Harry.

"You could've stayed inside your car you know?" I told him.He just shrugged and lied down beside Harry,pulling the blanket so he can get warmed up.

What the hell's wrong with them?It's already 9:30 in the morning and nobody wants to get up!

I made some breakfast for us,even though my head is pounding so hard,I drank two panadols but still,,no effect on me.I'm trying to recall what happened last night,and little by little,I'm remembering everything that happened.

"Fuck!" I whispered/shouted to myself.

I ran to my room,waking Louis up. "Louis WIlliam Tomlinson you better get your ass up!" I screamed,kicking him,trying to wake him up.

"What?" he groaned, I smacked his head.

"Louis we fucking slept together last night!" I said. "No we didn't. I mean we slept together but we didn't shagged each other" he reasoned out.

"Yes we fucking did" I uttered,folding the bed neatly.

"No we didn't,you're just drunk.you're dellusional" he fought back.

Maybe he's right,Maybe I'm so drunk I couldn't remember what happened with all the alcohol in my system.

I went back to the kitchen,Zayn was still sleeping whereas Harry was in the dining room,eating some leftovers from lastnight. "We drank too much last night didn't we?" he asked,I just nodded at him in agreement. "Oh,and put some clothes on you dick" I remarked,and threw his clothes at him.

I watched Zayn sleep,even thought I can't see his eyes,I still adore it.I still see the shine in it.His pouty lips makes him more sexy.But what's he doing here?He was supposed to meet me yesterday.

He's making me come back to him and leave me again.

I'm so sick and tired of pretending that I'm not hurt,especially infront of him.I don't want to get in between his family and him...

It still stung everytime I remember how his mum shouted at me,how his mum glared at me,and humiliated me infront of her children,with Zayn just listening to her,doing nothing.Is it bad that I wanted him to stand up for me?

I mean,I'm not forcing him to abandon his own family,but can he atleast say something?

"Stop staring at him,he'll melt" Louis commented as he's making his way on the stairs... "Shut up.this might be the last time I'll be able to stare at him,because the moment he wakes up,I'm shutting him out of my life" I said sadly,trying to hold my tears.I'm not gonna cry again.

"What the hell are you talking about?" he asked.

"I want to have a peace of mind" I told him. he pretended that he didn't heard what I said,I ignored that fact,and I stared at Zayn again.He's so perfect.I want to be with him for the rest of my life,but I can't.

I can't take all of this anymore,It's always the same.He'll hurt me,I'll cry,he'll come back to me and I'll accept him again,and back to hurting me again.

Or maybe it's my fault too,I'm being narrow-minded,not even bothering to hear Zayn's side.Maybe all I think about is myself.Maybe I'm being selfish about all this.

Here I go again,changing my mind.

I love him...I really do,but what If I make him choose between me and his mum?Who would he choose?But I don't want that to happen,yet I'm so sure it'll happen to end all this...This is all wrong.I don't know what to do right now.

For all I know,I love him.