Chapter 3

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-Eleanor-

"C'mon El, let's go out! We're missing everything!" Louis whined while I just stared at the window and enjoying the view outside.

"You can go out Lou, I'm fine. You'll have fun without me right?" I told him and he sat beside me.

"I can't go out without you and you know that, and well... the fans think that we're having sex thanks to Harry and Liam for making up sex jokes baout us" he said then we both laughed.

"Let's go out now, so they will think we're done having sex" I said then dragged him outside, I know it looks ridiculous if we'll go out while we're still wearing tracksuits. but who cares,right?

"Now that's the Eleanor that I've known" he said before we went out and faced thousands of people waiting for them outside.

People kept on taking pictures of us,we just smiled and held each other...How's Zayn doing with Perrie now? Is he okay? I hope they're not being mobbed.

<A/N:> please listen to Wherever You Are by 5sos while reading this. 

I wish that was me holding his hand right now,wrapping my arms around him,kissing him like it's the end of the world...

It hurts when I see an article about Zerrie being all cute and adorable, That should be me beside him, but what to do? I'm just a secret of him that should be kept. This will never be easy especially for me,I'm glad that Louis' here for me.

"Earth to Eleanor?Are you okay?" Louis asked me,while he's protecting me from all those paparazzis. He knows I hate it but hey, that's why I'm here right? I have to pretend to be his and only his girlfriend. I have to accept the fact that there will always be a pap following us. I can't ask for a private time with him...

I'm not his girlfriend.

I'm Zayn's and that where I want to be right now.

"Strabucks?" He offered. Yeah, I'm not really addicted to Starbucks. It's just that... people think that I'm so into it that we can never change it.

"Sure...Iced White Chocolate Mocha for me,venti..."

"No whip cream on top" we both said and I laughed because he knows what I want.

 We sat just a few meters from the door so no one can actually spot us.

We talked about their tour that I haven't had a chance to attend, all the fun stuff that they've been doing while they're on stage. and he told me about the 5sos boys, all about how great they are and how talented they are.

"Yeah, I know you've met them while we're in London but they're really fun El. I'm serious" he aid then his eyes twinkle like a boy opening a gift on Christmas day.

He kept on blabbing things that I can't absorb because my mind is filled with thoughts about Zayn and Perrie, everytime I remember the portrait of Perrie in Zayn's body,it makes me want to hang myself on a warehouse and be rotten in there forever.

"Hey...you're doing it again" he said,nudging me using his elbow.

"I'm doing what?" I asked as if I don't know what he's talking about. 

"You're idling again, are you still with me? or are you like... taken away from our world" he joked and I just gave him a smile because I'm not in the mood for laughing and joking with him. 

"Ugh. School stuffs, Lou" then I sipped on my drink for the last time before we went out and have a walk again. 

While we're walking...

"Yeah El,school stuffs? or Zayn?" he said then I just shut my mouth.

"Okay fine,it's Zayn...I'm so worried about him you know? What if he's already falling for Perrie and he's just staying with me out of pity? What if he doesn't love me anymore?" I can't help but to cry again,and unfortunately...

A pap caught me crying... So Louis hugged me and hid my face. I cried harder than I was before.

"Let's go back to the hotel now babe" he said before one of their security guided us.

--

Perrie's sat beside Zayn while we're having dinner inside their hotel room. No one can see us here, so why does she have to sit beside my boyfriend? My real boyfriend.

"I'm just gonna go freshen up" I excused myself but nobody seemed to care... I went to Zayn's room and read some text messages that I haven't read since I got here.

"Hey El" Perrie cooed and smiled at her and asked her what does she need...

"Uhm I just wanted to say sorry if you can't have a private time with Zayn but the management told me to go here" she explained and I smiled at her,again.

"It's okay Perrie, I just need a time to realize that we'll never do what a regular boyfriend-girlfriend does. I'm okay" I lied and she went out again and I lied on the bed.

I can smell his perfume in his pillow so I hugged it as if it was him.

It was never easy for me to let everything sink in.

That I will always be a secret that they should keep inside the closet. I will always be Louis' girlfriend and not Zayn's.

For a while we pretended that we never had to end it....

But we knew we had to say goodbye...

I spotted Niall's guitar beside Harry's bed so I pulled it outside the case and tried playing Skinny Love.

C'mon skinny love... just last the year, pour a little salt...you were never here. m-m-my m-m--my m-m-my my... starting at sink of blood and crushed veneer...

"knock knock Calder" and that was Harry so I stopped playing the guitar, as well as shedding a tear.

"Hey Harry...sorry if I used this guitar: I said while wiping away my tears so he wouldn't notice that I was crying here being all stupid.

"It's okay El, I missed El-bear though we haven't seen eacb other for so long" Harry joked and he hugged me.

"Stop it,I'm always with you guys whenever I have free time" I said.

"Yeah...like you spend it with all of us, you're always with Zayn and Louis. You forgot who your first ever friend in this band. Hint: me!" he answered and we both shared a laughed.

"Well,I'm sorry but you're always busy heating up with supermodels" I teased...

He complimented me on my guitar skills and my voice sounded great. Yeah I'm a full time performer on soundcloud.

We were just having a blast while we're playing some songs and singing it like we're in the stage.

"Hey,I want to talk to you about something"  He sat properly and cleared his throat I did the same and I asked him what is it about...

"It's about you,you're acting all weird since the day you got here which was yesterday..." he stated,and I just listened to what he's about to say.

"I'm worried about you,I see how bummed you are when Zayn told you that Perrie will be here,I see how hurt you are when we're outside earlier.and now,I see how broken you are.Dear god,you're singing Birdy's song!" he explained and I can't help but to cry again.

"I'm sorry if you had to see me like this,I just don't know what to do.At first,yes it was okay. But then I see the way he looks at Perrie sometimes,the way he looks at me.It's the same Harry and it hurts so much and I hate to admit it but I am so insecure!" I cried then he hugged me again until I stopped crying.

-

So this chapter is so full of drama... Heleanor feels, Zerrie... everything and 5sos! woohoo!

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