When I first Knew.

When I first told him... (Draco)

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I made a part completely from Draco's point of view. 

Enjoy!

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It was warm and cozy. Sitting across the table from him. It was different, but a good kind of different. I don't know what it is, I have never been speechless, I always had something to say. But well... now.

It is different. I never felt so nervous. Never.

I just want him to... you know. I want him. I like him, I realize that now. Just want him to be happy. He is so cute when he smiles. I look over my eyelashes secretly tracking all of his movements.

He is so damn beautiful. Merlin.
I don't want to break that smile but... I have to ask this.

"Harry?" I say softly.
He looks at me. Raising his eyebrows.
"How have you been doing?"
He smiles. But it doesn't feel like a genuine smile. "I have been doing fine Malfoy"
"Draco"
He looks at me surprised. "Call me Draco. No Malfoy" I say, sounding more aggressive then i meant to be.

A bit of awkward silence later, both just finishing our drinks. He just takes the last sip of his pumpkin juice when I ask,

"Harry- I wanted to ask if- I wanted to ask- Are you gay?"

He just starts coughing, turning red. When he regains his breath he says shy:
"I- I think I am? I think a am bisexual? I think girls are attractive too... But boys... also? Can that be?I only fell in love with guys I guess?" He is still red as a tomato.

"Oh " is all I can say with that stupid head of mine.
Again it was silence for a moment. Until Harry started talking again,

"I always thought I was just weird. Until 4th year. There he was. Cedric. My hero. Literally, he saved my ass a couple times. He was so kind. So handsome. I didn't even know it was love. Until..." he silenced

I look at him. Grabbing his hand. "Until..?"

"Until he kissed me"

I didn't know what to say. "Cedric kissed you?"

"We..- I-think I-"

"You don't have to tell me, Harry. Only if you want to"

"Can we go outside please?"

I look around. Of course, we are still in the same bar... I look at Harry, grab his hand and drag him away from here. Running. When we are far away from the bar I stop to take a look at Harry. 

Harry stares at me. Shocked. "You-you forgot to pay I think"

"Dine and Dash, Harry, going away without paying"

"What- The- HELL DRAC-"

"Care me to tell me about Cedric?"

He became quiet. Looked at the ground and started walking. I ran after him.

"Only if you want to"

He grabbed my hand. Looked at me and started talking.

"We dated for a while. He cheated on Cho. With me. I still hated that. I hate that I let that happen to Cho. I hate to be "that" person. I-I am horrible"

"Hey! calm down!"
He breathed in and out.
I look at him. "How did that happen? Want to tell me?"

"The first time... something happened. Was after the first trial. The dragons. He came to thank me. And gave me the hint to the next task. That I was an amazing person. That he hoped i would win. And that he would help me with the next task"

Harry looked at me shamefully. "I know it is bad... He met me at the perfects bath that night. We kissed"

Oh god. Cedric's death must have really hurt him. Messed him up.
"How long did you... how long?"
"Too long"
I looked at Harry.
A million thoughts went through my mind. 

He looked at his hands. He was twisting his hands, nervously. "You must hate me, despite me." Again, those tears. I don't want to see him cry no more. I want him to be happy,  I want him to rest, I want to take the pain away. I just... I wish...

I look at him, raise my eyebrow. "I don't hate you, Harry"

"You used to..."

"I never did Harry, I never did, I never hated you" 

"He promised me he would leave her, he promised it, all the time."  

I sigh heavily. "Harry, it is alright"

He gazed at me. His eyes far open. I need to tell him. I can't tell him. I should tell him. I don't know. What if I scare him? What if he thinks I am not serious? I am serious about him.

"Harry?"

I regret my choice imminently. 

"I don't care Harry"

"Wha-what?"

I hesitate before I continue to talk. Just for a moment, before I go on with my monologue. "Harry I like you, I mean. A lot. Really a lot. Like a lot. lot. lot. " I stop to breathe before I continue "I mean for Merlin's sake and I don't care what you have done in the past. I mean I kinda care. I am kinda jealous. But well. I mean Bloody hell- You are the boy who lived- Everyone wants you. I want you- I mean you are hot and all, but that is not what I mean. I just-"

I stop when I suddenly feel Harry's soft lips against mine. My mind goes black- Can't think. Can't do anything else. Just moving my lips against his, moaning, pulling him closer. I want more. I want him.