Heir of Fire and Ice

Scars

Elentiya wasn't sure what to think of Rowan. It was clear that he didn't really know what to say, and that it frustrated Aelin. Could she really talk to him as she pleased? Aelin murmured something to him, and he asked her:

"Do you want to keep your scars?" She blinked in surprise. Why would he ask such a question? He must have mistaken it as confusion, because he added, "Some people like to try to forget. Pretend it never happened. I bear my scars, though, as a mark of what I survived."

"Yes. I mean, no." Why did he have to confuse her like that? "I mean, I want to keep my scars." They were her's to keep. Not Maeve's, because she didn't belong to Maeve. Maybe she never had. Maybe that was why Maeve had hurt her. Because Elentiya was the only thing that she could never truly own.

They left that night. Elentiya was wearing a soft but simple white tunic and trousers. She had been upset to learn that she could not wear the beautiful new cloak they had given her. It was midnight blue with silver lining, and fitted her beautifully. Aelin had laughed when she spent ten minutes admiring herself in the mirror. 

To say that she was not nervous would be a lie. Rowan had asked if she would be able to cope with running, and when asking the distance, he ad been vague, but stated that it wasn't far. Confident at the time, she had said yes, but it now nagged at her. What if they left her by accident? What if she couldn't make it? What if they judged her for it?

Now, outside in the early evening, the slight chill biting at her ears, she felt truly alive. It was as if she were ready for anything. A dangerous misconception, but a welcome one. Now that they were ready, she couldn't wait to get moving, her fears vanished. Aelin nodded, and they set off. At first, having never run before, she stumbled a bit, getting accustomed to the way her body moved through the mess of forest, but soon she was able to let her instincts take over. Gods, this was amazing. The speed, the adrenaline, the feel of it all. Faster. She was on wings, her feet barely touching the floor. Elated, she pushed harder, going faster than she had ever thought was possible. A small part of her protested that she couldn't possibly maintain this, surely, but she was sure she could. She wasn't even out of breath, as impossible as it seemed. 

Eventually, though she longed to go on, they slowed - they must be there. Breathing harder (It would seem there was a limit), she gazed down at the galleon bellow. It was something from a dream, with the dragon figurehead and sleek dark wood. Questioning, she glanced at Aelin, who nodded in encouragement.

"Now," said Rowan, "Would be a great time to see if you can shift." What was shifting? He seemed to read the words in her eyes, and looked to reply,

Your animal form. Not all demi-fae have the ability, but considering that both Aelin and I can, you probably will be able to, as well.

How do I... Shift, then?

It's hard to describe. It's like reaching in, and pushing against an inner veil. Try. 

Okay...

Fine. I'll show you then. There was a flash of white light, and where Rowan was standing was now a hawk. She couldn't help giggling - she had never seen anyone do that before. It was so odd - one moment, a male, the next, a hawk. It was almost comical. And that conversation - it was the first time he had treated her like he wasn't nervous or awkward. It was like, once he looked, he had understood her. It warmed her that he would even try. Centering herself around that feeling, she reached in, as he had suggested, finding a place of light and warmth. In the middle, stood a glimmering veil, as Rowan had described. Hesitantly, Elentiya pushed through it, and there was an unexpected flash of pain, but then... What was she? It was honestly impossible to tell, except that she was now much smaller, with a different set of muscles. Looking around, she had much larger vision.

"An owl," Rowan murmured. Was she? Looking down, she saw sleek brow feathers. Yes - she was a tawny owl.

"Jump off the cliff. Don't worry - I won't let you die. This is how all birds learn to fly." Standing on the edge, Elentiya couldn't really help doubting. She had never been scared of heights, but that didn't mean she enjoyed jumping off cliffs. "Just jump. Thinking makes it harder." Right, then. Taking a deep breath, she launched herself forwards and off the cliff.

And she flew. Earlier - the running - was nothing compared to this complete feeling of freedom. She soared upwards, towards the moon, then dived back down, opening her wings at the last moment. Her senses enhanced, she could see the fish two hundred meters bellow, hear the wind calling to her. She had never realised before, that it had a voice. Feeling the updraft, she tried - just because - to change its course. Instantly, she plummeted, but that was to be expected. Reversing whatever it was she had just done, she once again soared upwards, enjoying the taste of the wind. Up here, there were no limits, no boundaries. Up here, she was free.