You Look Like an Angel

Epilogue

It took Lucifer a long time to acknowledge he was grieving for Sam.

Doing so was gruesomely selfish. Sam was safe. Sam was topside and free. At least he wasn't here. That was all that mattered. No, Lucifer did not miss him. To do so would be to wish unspeakable agony on the helpless human, and Lucifer did not wish that on his Sam. He never had. Yet this place had inflicted that punishment intended for Lucifer alone on the defenseless human anyway. No, Lucifer did not miss him.

He took comfort in the fact that Sam would not remember this. Sam would not remember the years of insufferable torture at the hands of one whom he thought was the Devil, acting just as the Devil was perceived to act. No, Sam would not remember that, and Lucifer was grateful.

He was also grateful for the time he had spent with Sam. He liked to think they had bonded, just a little. It was alright that Sam would not remember this, because Sam had given Lucifer an inimitable gift before they parted. Three simple words, and Sam probably wasn't even aware of their value to Lucifer.

"I get it."

In all his eons of existence, Lucifer hadn't realized how badly he needed to be understood. He had been so adamant in proving his case, only to viewed as a freak, a monster, a lunatic. No one had taken his side, or even bothered to hear him out. To finally have someone understand, to validate his view, had been elating. He could hold onto that –the fact that someone, somewhere, had understood him, even if that someone would not remember doing so.

Yet, Lucifer could not deny the gaping hole inside of him –remanence of an absence he would not allow himself to acknowledge he was feeling. Sam was safe, Sam was free, Sam was gone.

Gone forever...

Lucifer wasn't aware of the time passing –truly, it was unpredictable in this place anyway. He sat, arms draped over his knees, not really thinking about anything. Unable to make himself care anymore.

Adam and Michael returned at some point. Adam wanted to know where Sam had gone. Lucifer explained how Death had taken Sam back to the surface because Dean had made a deal. Adam stood gaping, then shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at the ground.

Lucifer gazed up long enough to phrase the question, "Are you upset that Dean picked Sam over you?"

"A little," Adam admitted, "I mean, I'm not surprised, I guess. I was always an afterthought, anyway."

Michael made a comment about the heavenly hosts releasing him someday. Lucifer was only dimly aware of how the suggestion lacked the self-righteous vibrato Michael usually spoke with –the statement merely proposing it would be the logical course of action for those loyal enough to still want the apocalypse –particularly Raphael. He also added the Winchester brothers would likely stop it, but promised to bring Adam with him if he ever was released...

Lucifer stopped paying attention after that. Their words meant little to him.

Time passed...

It had to, although there was no way to measure it.

Adam and Michael wandered to the other end of the Cage. For the most part, they left Lucifer alone.

PsydoLucifer was seen less frequently. Lucifer would occasionally glimpse him walking the abyss, sometimes muttering to himself. The creature didn't seem to pay him much mind.

Lucifer wouldn't care if he did.

He was alone now.

The ground trembled.

A deep rumble, almost like an earthquake. The Cage shook, momentarily pulling Lucifer into alertness –his prison had never acted this way before. Had the angels truly returned for Michael? It stopped as soon as it started but both Lucifer and Michael took off to the top, searching for anything, any sign— surely an outside force was at work here!

When they finally gave up –the Cage remaining as endless as it had ever been –Lucifer was crushed. He had allowed himself to hope, and that was dangerous. It didn't matter what had caused the disturbance. He was still stuck down here. As he had been. As he always would be.

He ignored Michael and returned to his seating.

Sometime later he heard PsydoLucifer talking, but when he glanced over his shoulder the creature was alone, speaking to the darkness overhead. Perhaps even it had gone mad.

Or maybe it was going to torture him again.

Did it matter?

Lucifer didn't care, and after a while, he stopped seeing PsydoLucifer altogether.