lie ↬ jensoo

doesn't

"Why? Why did you break up? What happened? Did you two fight? Are you not interested in the same gender anym—" Jin kept on rambling and rambling until I stopped him.

"Stop, stop, calm down with the questions!"

"Sorry, but seriously, why?"

"I don't know, it's not because I'm not interested in the same gender anymore, it's
just..." I sighed.

"Just?"

"I was confused about my feelings towards her. I convinced myself that I no longer love her but half of me is still saying that I do. I ended up breaking up with her because I believed that my feelings for her are really gone," I smiled,
sadly.

"What you were feeling was 6 months ago. What about now? Do you love her?" he asked while looking straight at me.

"I-I don't know..."

"Don't answer me with that, yes or no?" he looked intensely at me.

I breathed in heavily and my heart started to beat faster. I don't know why I'm acting like this. I don't even know why I said 'I don't know' in the first place. All I have to do is to just say a simple 'no' since I don't have any romantic feelings for her anymore. Don't I?

"No," I told him and I bit my bottom lip when I did.

My heart started to ache as I say so. I'm not lying, am I? I'm pretty sure that I only see her as a friend. I broke up with her for a reason, right? Those romantic feelings I have for her in the first place shouldn't come back.

"Give me your wallet," he demanded and I looked confusingly at him. I just took it from my bag then gave it to him. That was when I realized I was so stupid for giving it to him.

He opened it and he took something from inside. It was a picture. Not just any ordinary picture, it had Jennie on it. He held it up with only his middle and index finger, while he rose his eyebrow as he looked at me.

"Explain this then."

"That's from before, I forgot to take it out—"

"Oh, shut up, this is obviously a recent picture of hers. Stop lying to yourself, it's saddening. Stop saying that you don't love her when it's so obvious that you do. Even if you broke up with her, the romantic feelings you had for her can come back. It just means that you truly love her until the end," he finally finished his food and he smiled at me.

My brother is right, I'm really am just a liar. My feelings for her did come back. I wanted to be her lover again. I yearn for her hugs every once in a while. I miss the moments where we would cuddle each other and show affection towards each other. I miss us.

Suddenly, my phone vibrated, meaning someone had texted me. I opened the text message and it was from Jennie.

Jendeukie
Goodbye.
Please, don't forget me.
I love you.

As I read that, Lisa suddenly called me and I quickly answered it. What she told me caused me to stand up and I took my bag in a rush.

"What happened?" Jin looked at me, worriedly.

"I'm sorry, but I have to go. I'll call you later on to inform you!" I went outside the restaurant and started running towards our dorm.