Lost and Found

(1) Jiggle Your Boobs

"Outfit one or outfit two? Which is more pleasing? Hmm? Oh, I should opt to outfit two perhaps." I held the the two same v-neck shirt in my both hands choosing what to wear for the day.

Yep, two same shirts in different colors. Outfit one was gray, outfit two was black. If I wear outfit one, I would definitely look like a rockstar wannabe but if I wear outfit two, I will look like an emo kid still in phase.

I don't want to look like a goth today.

So I chose outfit one.

Still in my bra and black skinny pants, I sashayed my way through the large vanity mirror in my room holding the gray shirt when someone just barged inside, without noticing I am f*cking half naked. I tried to cover myself but it was too late and not really helpful at all.

"Still small tits." My friend, no slash that, my gay friend who doesn't really look like gay but is really gay but his voice and appearance doesn't look gay.

It really does complicate me at first. The first time he did this, I was running and throwing him stuff through his face for invading my girly moment. It was embarrassing being in the same room with a man (even her heart was a girl) looking at me while I'm wearing nothing except for my mismatched underwear.

He slumped on my bed and hugged Mr. Wiggles, my big stuffed toy Andrew Morris won for me in the carnival. It was the best and the brightest moment of my life. Having my crush give me something is a big event in my life for me.

"So what do you think, should I wear this gray shirt or the black one?" I asked him, still looking in the vanity mirror and tried to match the shirts that would suit my day.

"Both of them will not make your boobs better. Go pick something else. We're gon be really late if you don't make up your mind." He didn't even bothered to look at me. What the hell is wrong with this guy today being a grumpy ass of a friend?

To prove him wrong, I jiggled, jumped to and fro in his front. My boobs doesn't look like double D'S but enough to make a man groan. My boobs are amazing and I bet he's just jealous because he only has balls and no vagina to screw boys. Well, he has an ass but it's really gross.

My gay friend didn't look happy the way my boobs jiggled like jelly in front of him. His face was neutral but he's pissed. Ohhh I can see that. Neutral face means he's not pleases or pissed. Well, I think it looks like both. Still I'm not close to ending the live show for him since he did not help me about my outfit, I'm gonna make him jealous that he'll go to a plastic surgeon and have an appointment for a boob job.

Jiggle

Jiggle

Jiggle

Jiggle

"Stop! I get it. It's annoying, have you got no shame?" He asked seriously as if I have grown another pair.

Talking about shame between us when it flew away long ago. Shame was nothing to us, hell it's even an ancient word. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a slut for doing this. He's just the first guy whom I do the joke with.

"Duh, shame is such a word for a guy like you. So, are you gonna help me or I'm gonna shake my boobies again?" I wiggled my brows again while pinching my gorgeous girls.

It's such a weird thing that I quietly enjoyed what I was doing to him instead him enjoying what I was doing. Live shows are for keeps.

"Stop making me gag. Go for the gray, at least you don't look like an emo. And hurry up, your mother is whipping something delicious."

See? The gay noticed too.

"By delicious, you mean cereals?" My mother and our kitchen aren't friends. I always do the deed. Mom almost burned our house down. Since then, I had a restraining arrest for her in the stove and microwave.

At least she can boil water. That's already okay and handy for me.

Toby "Tobylyna" Matthew Ryans went down first. Yep, he likes to be called Tobylyna that rhymes with Thumbelina. He's not really small, he's actually 6'0 but I do hope he did not rhyme with Thumbelina because he has a small dick. Not that I would tap him. We're friends, and sacred rule is that never tap thy friends.

I chose the gray outfit and paired it with my black converse shoes and my electric pink hoodie. I'm colorful as the unicorn today and my sense of fashion is really lacking. I'm weak in that department but it's really not a problem.

When I came downstairs, Tobylyna and Mommy were happily chatting like they were some kind of lost friends who found each other again. Loud voices seeped from walls to walls.

Are they deaf? The could wake the crickets up!

"Hey guys!" I kissed Mommy in her pinky cheeks.

I almost didn't noticed that she was wearing her work attire. Is she leaving again? She just came back a day ago and we haven't done much anything except cleaning her guns.

"Work again Mom?" I asked her, munching the front loops and made a sour face.

Much to my dismay, she said yes. It's actually fine. I'm not harboring some angry feelings for her. Her job kept roof on our heads and food on our tables, but I miss her terribly on the days that she's not here.

Tobylyna kept silent. He was just eating the cereal too.

"I'm sorry baby girl, my boss called. Apparently, there's an underground I need to cover. You know your Mom, I'm the best of them."

Mom is not only gorgeous, but a cocky and cunning little vixen. Just like me. Deal with it.

"You know you don't have to wear contacts. You've got pretty eyes." Pretty eyes my ass.

My eyes looked like Grandma Mathilda's white fluffy cat. I remind myself of that fluffy and white cat— a bitchy one. When I was in grade school, I was often times called a wicked witch for having different colors of irises in each eye.  Ever since then, I begged my mom to buy me the blue contact lenses to match my blue eye.

But Tobylyna and Mommy has agreed that my eyes look pretty. Well wscrew their opinions, I'm not going go back and be the laughing stock again. They might skewer me for real like those old century witches.

"Yep. Keeps me pretty." I told them both, brushing off the topic. Because we have this same topic everytime Mommy gets home.

"You don't have to jiggle boobs hon so you could look pretty. Just bat that pretty eyes of yours and all will worship the ground you walk."

My eyes went wide. He did not just said that in front of my Mom. I thought our live show was all a secret. I glared at him, sending nicely polished daggers to his way. But the asshole just laughed. He thinks this was entertaining for a morning ritual.

"What boobs?" Mommy asked that made me drop trickles of sweat.

What a f*cking happy morning y'all.