I Just Want To Survive | Michael X Reader |

3. you feel what I feel as well

Y/n p.o.v:
After last week Jeremy stopped hanging out with Michael and that left me with him. It made me upset for two reasons:
1. Being that Jeremy was leaving Michael all alone and from what I have seen he's a great person and shouldn't be going through this pain.
2.He was hanging out with brooke and all the other cool kids as well as Christine. I know I should be happy about him finding a place to belong but I can't help but feel jealous. I now figured out that I liked Jeremy. I know wow. And honestly I wasn't surprised that he didn't see me the same way. At least that's what I thought.
I don't know what to do anymore. I don't have any friends that could help me in this situation. Well there was always Michael but I didn't know if I should trust him.  I guess I'll have to make up my mind by lunch.
Soon lunch came around and I was sitting alone again waiting for michael to come. I had decided to tell him about my crush on Jeremy. Maybe he could help me. Five minutes passed. Then 10 minutes. Then 15 minutes.
I waited and waited.
I finally lost hope and went outside to where the bleachers were. As soon as I went outside I smelt something familiar. Someone was smoking. I wanted to go back inside but then I remembered that Michael also smoked some weed sometimes. I didn't know if I should take the risk of walking next to someone who was as high as a cloud.
I quickly pecked at the corner of the school building and saw that it was Michael smoking. Great now if I wanted to talk to him i'd have to smell all that weed. "Yo, Mike!" I screamed as loud as I could using both my hands so that I could cup them aroud my mouth and help project my voice a little louder. When Michael heard me he jumped not to much but a noticeable. As he looked my way I saw that he  upset. "Hey didn't mean to scare you, if I knew it scared you that much then I wouldn't have done that." He still continued to look at me as if he was looking through all my secrets. I began to feel really uncomfortable and I felt a light blush beginning to form. Michael looked away suddenly and focused on the trees in the parking lot.
At that moment in time it looked like he wanted to be alone and yet he also looked like he needed someone to comfort him. Knowing me I would have just left me but at that moment in time I felt like it was my duty to go and comfort. He was the only thing close to being my friend.

Michael's p.o.v:
I wanted her to leave right now and yet I wanted her to stay with me. If she* stayed then she would see be able to see all my insecurities. That scared me, I was supposed to be the upbeat fun guy to be around. Guess that mask was slowly falling. Just as I was deciding whether or not to tell y/n to leave she grabbed my in a hug. At that moment I felt my a small blush- wait. Me?! Blushing. The feeling that someone cared about me, the person that really hated how I smelled and what I did was standing there and hugging me while I was smoking pot. That made my blush a bright red and I really hoped that y/n didn't see me. I was supposed to keep my chill vibe. And I was definitely losing that vibe.

Y/n p.o.v:
"Tell me what's wrong." I whispered holding back the urge to run away and cleanse my nostrils from this disgusting smell. I couldn't see anything since my face was just pressed onto the back of his red hoodie. The polar bear skin felt really soft and I was enjoying the soft feeling. Then I heard a soft cry. And then it grew louder. Michael was crying? I didn't want to look at him since I knew how it felt when people knew you were crying. You felt like curling up in a ball and hiding away from society while the other half of you wanted to be comforted by the people around you. And yet whenever they did comfort you, you still always ended up feeling like it's better to just go hide under a rock and never be found until you're okay again. Or when you've found your mask again.

"Hey what's wrong Michael?" I asked still trying not to feel to disgusted by the smell of weed. "I-It's just that I feel so lonely now that I don't have Jeremy with me anymore. He's gone now and-" After that I could only hear small parts of what he was trying to say. He stopped and began to sob. I didn't want to make things feel awkward for Michael so I also decided to tell him how I was upset that Jeremy left the group for the 'better' friends that he found. "I also feel the same. It's like Jeremy was fine and he was fun when I saw him that one day. But once he was with Christine its like he forgot about you and I. And it doesn't help that... that I developed some feelings towards him. There I said it!" I began to cry a little and hugged Michael tighter. It felt like my entire wall that I built...

Michael's p.o.v:
...Came tumbling down.

vvAuthor's notevv
* I just realized that I used "she" and I know some people don't like to be called she or he and prefer it and I'm sorry if u triggered you. The only reason i do this is because I imagine myself in the person position and then I use "she" because I am a girl. I hope you understand and won't try to fight me. (Pls don't I'll probaby lose) If my straightness really does offend you I'm sorry. (I AM NOT HOMOPHOBIC, I mean hello tree boys and boyfriends)