Barry Allen Imagines

38;

"Hey!" Barry listened to your voicemail chirp and felt his heart break at only the sound of your voice. "I'm sorry I missed your call because I'm probably out doing something awesome right now,"
"With her boyfriend!" Could be very faintly heard in the background, a hushed shushing following it from you before you continued talking.
"But leave me a message and I'll be sure to call you back when I can. Thanks!"
Barry remembered the exact events of you recording that and, despite the anguish his heart felt, he couldn't help but reminisce on the good times.
"Since you're the idiot who broke my phone, forcing me to get a new one, it's your responsibility to help me come up with a new voicemail greeting." You sat down beside him cross legged on the couch while you fiddled with your new iPhone case—this one was life-proof which you hoped was synonymous with Barry-Allen-proof.
"What was wrong with your old one? Couldn't you just stick with that one?" He questioned as he mindlessly watched an episode of How I Met Your Mother. (He'd seen that episode in particular about a dozen times but the Slapsgiving ones would forever be his favorite and never ceases to crack him up).
"No!" You huffed, elbowing your boyfriend in the arm for more attention. "That was so boring and generic. I want something that fits me better."
Barry thought for a minute, deciding to mess around with you. "How about 'I'm too busy to answer your call because my amazingly perfect boyfriend Barry Allen is currently'—" He cut himself off when he received another much harsher blow to his side from your "pointy little elbow" (as he always claimed you had; especially when you accidentally elbow him at night and nearly brake his ribs).
"I seriously hate you." You grumbled and you fumbled with your phone since Barry was going to be no help whatsoever you were left to your own devices.
"You didn't hate me last night, especially when I vibrated my fingers and—"
"Barry! I was recording!!" You shrieked as you simultaneously tried to erase the vulgar recording and cover his mouth.
"Oops." It was quite obvious that he wasn't at all sorry since it made your cheeks aflame in embarrassment of the intimate topic. You were worse than he was when a sexual expression or innuendo was mentioned because while he might joke around or glance awkwardly around the room, your cheeks always seemed to redden instantly and you couldn't hold eye contact with anyone really. And while you had gotten better since broaching the topic with Barry, you still felt shy to discuss anything remotely sexual when there was a chance anyone besides Barry could hear. And speaking about it in the West's living room was not the safest of places.
"I'll just come up with one on my own." You conceded before dialing up voicemail again and putting it on speakerphone.
Your mind scrambled through all the clever things to say before the beep went off. When it did, you weren't exactly ready but you gave it your best shot because you could always restart. "Hey," Your voice was shaky at the start but you decided to continue. "Thanks for calling me and I'm sorry I couldn't answer your call at this time–"
"She's too busy with her boyfriend for you!" Barry said, and since it was on speakerphone you were sure it caught his comment, casting a glare his way in response.
"Barry!" You instantly ending the recording. He only grinned in reply and it was his signature, irresistible grin; the one where he smiled so wide his eyes squinted and his grin showed off his teeth as well, which usually ended up with him staring at the floor until he could control his smile once again.
"Okay, okay," He conceded, finally giving up his charade and willing to help you. "What exactly do you want this message to achieve, peaches?" (He had taken up calling you peaches because of how often you tended to blush and it just sort of stuck with you but you didn't complain considering he said he had a 'girlfriend' in middle school he used to call tootsie).
"I want something that's quick and unique that is much more interesting than that automated crap."
Barry leaned back against the couch cushions behind him, lifting his feet up to the coffee table as he pondered what you could say.
He thought about you; everything he knew and loved about you and still he was stumped. Suddenly it seemed like Barry could fill a novel with all the things you made him feel, or about all your little quirks or bad habits that all of which he loved. There was no way he could figure out a way to summarize you in only thirty seconds. But he had to help you try. If it would make you happy then there was no way he could deny you of such a simplistic thing.
Besides, this was really a trivial thing anyway. No one left voicemails anymore unless it was urgent so it wasn't like the message would be heard very often.
"Okay," He said, sitting up a bit straight as he twisted a bit to see you better. "How about this..."
If Barry had known at that time just how much he'd treasure that moment or even just hearing the sound of your voice, he would had done everything in his power to have made it more sentimental.
It had only been over a week since he lost you to Zoom's cruel games and as if things couldn't get any worse Zoom decided to kill Barry's father only days after your death, leaving him alone to grieve the two people he loved most in the world.
His room was still home to several of your things which left him shaking at the sight of something as simple as your toothbrush on the bathroom counter but he also couldn't bring himself to get rid of anything of yours. You'd claimed two of his dresser drawers for your clothes (since it seemed like he convinced you to spend the night with him more often than not), and Barry didn't even consider that his room anymore. It was your room, your shared room.
He was currently sitting on the West's front steps, clutching his phone as he dialed your number again, desperate to here your voice. He would normally listen to it once or twice before he actually left his message—and while he knew you'd never hear them, it made him feel much closer to you which was all he wanted since your departure.
"I told you I'd catch him, peaches." He sighed into the phone, tears once again brimming his eyes but he didn't really try to hold them back anymore. It felt like he had nothing left to lose anymore and showing weakness wasn't the biggest issue on his mind at that time. "I beat him at his own game but I still don't feel like I've won. I've lost both you and dad so close together and I'm grateful that Zoom is gone but I don't feel like I should be celebrating it. No amount of celebration will bring the two of you back to me so why should I enjoy this when you're not here to do the same? It just doesn't make sense or seem fair at all."
Iris seemed to slip outside just in time to see another tear slide down Barry's cheek, making Barry end his message much sooner than usual since he usually let the voicemail cut him off before he stopped.
She silently sat down in front of him, waiting for him to be the one to break the silence.
"I can't stop thinking about her. Everything around me reminds me of her but then it hits me that she's gone and I'll never see her again." His eyes glossy as he spoke.
"I can't even imagine how it feels to have gone through everything you have this past month; losing your powers, dying, becoming a part of the speed force and regaining your powers, then losing not only your girlfriend but also your father. I can't even imagine how hard that all must've been."
"We won," He sarcastically laughed. "We beat Zoom and saved not only this Earth but Earth Two as well. We won but it feels like I've lost everything. It doesn't feel like I've won without y/n by my side."
"That's because you've lost a lot in your life, Bare, more than most." Iris sighed, internally debating whether or not now was a good time to bring up her own feelings towards Barry but before she even had a chance to say the words ('But maybe you and me... seeing where we go...), Barry interrupted again.
"I just feel so hollowed out inside without her here. I've never felt so broken in my life since it feels like everyone I love is destined to die no matter how hard I try to protect them all. I feel like I've let everyone down and made all the wrong choices ever since we found out Zoom was actually Jay and I don't even feel like a hero anymore because of all of it."
"You're not alone, Barry." Iris vehemently insisted. "There are half a dozen people in that house who would do anything for you. And as for not being a hero—you're the most heroic person I know. You've saved me and this city over and over again without any hesitation. If anyone deserves to be happy, it'd be you." And I could make you happy, she thought.
Little did she know, the only thought on Barry's mind at that time was how happy you and him had made each other. All the late night laughs and giggles when you were restless, the stupid shows you always watched together, all the first times you two shared with each other, even those pointless arguments you had about his heroic decisions that would always be resolved later on. He treasured all those moments now and will never ever forget them.
"I just need to find peace." Impossible, he thought. It'd be impossible to find peace again without you since you were always his rock. You kept him grounded and levelheaded and without you he felt ready to burst.
Sensing that what she came outside to achieve would never happen, Iris sighed and stood back on her feet to retreat. "We'll all be here for you, Barry. No matter what happens you can always come to me for help or a shoulder to lean on."
Then the idea hit him. As stupid as someone else may have perceived his idea, to him it was genius.
He would find peace again. If you were the key to that, then that's what he was gonna do.
Instead of going back to save his mother like someone would've assumed, you were the only thing on his mind as he raced to save the one person who could save him