Sherlock Imagines and Preferences 2

In The Moonlight

You gasped for air as more tears flowed. A strangled yell escaped from deep within as you lost all control over yourself. Waves of guilt and pain washed over you, showing no mercy. It was one hurtful reminder after another. Sherlock was dead. You would never see him again and the only one to blame was you. 

There would never be a day of light in your life again. All happiness had been sucked away. It had left your body the second your eyes saw his limp body on the ground. He held the key. Only he would be able to make you smile again. But he was two meters underneath the dirt, hidden from view. The key to your happiness would forever be out of your reach.

At this realisation, your tears stopped flowing and a sad smile etched its way onto your face. You were starting to come to terms with your tragic fate.

You closed your eyes, facing the lights in the sky. ''I'm sorry and I forgive you,'' you whispered. ''And no matter what happens from this moment on, I will always love you. You will forever hold a place in my heart, Sherlock Holmes.''

You opened your eyes, a single tear sliding down your cheek. You stood up, wrapping your coat tightly around yourself. A cloud slowly drifted to the moon, blocking out its pale light. The city became enveloped by wistful darkness, mirroring the suffocating silence your heart carried. 

Your feet began to carry you to the graveyard and didn't stop until you reached his headstone. You knelt down in front of it, caressing the golden letters ever so slightly. ''Hi,'' you muttered, smiling slightly. Knowing no one would answer, you opened your mouth to continue, but against all odds, someone cut you off.

''Such a beautiful evening. Why would you waste it on visiting an empty grave?''

Your breath hitched in your throat and your eyes widened. That voice, that beautifully deep voice you had missed so much brought back so many memories. Shakily, you stood up and turned around as slowly as you could. 

''I know it has taken me quite long- two years to be exact, but your wish has been granted.'' 

A sob escaped your lips. ''You're not real,'' you denied. 

''Though, here I am, standing in front of you, next to the grave that holds my name but not my body. I am real, (Y/N), and you know it. I'm not dead, I'm here.''

Tears brimmed your eyes as you shook your head. ''How could you?!'' You yelled. ''Do you have any idea what you have put me through? I thought you were dead, Sherlock! I cried over you, I hurt myself, I hurt others because of the grief that was swallowing me! You ruined my life when you left! You bastard!'' 

''(Y/N)—'' 

''NO!'' You interrupted. ''You don't have the right to hurt people like that! I mourned you and not only me but John, Greg and everyone else, too! And the entire time you were alive and well, not caring enough to even send a text!'' 

''ENOUGH!'' He yelled. 

You shut your mouth, your entire body shaking in anger and frustration. 

''You don't realise how hard it was to leave you behind like that! It has not been easy for me either! I am sorry for hurting you, I am sorry for all the things I did wrong! I am sorry! But don't you dare say I don't care! I do care, (Y/N)! That's why I left in the first place! I was protecting you and John and everyone else by faking my own death!'' He took a deep breath, calming himself down. ''Listen, (Y/N), I know what I did was wrong but I had no other choice at the time. I did it because I love you. Not a single day went by wherein I didn't think of you. You were on my mind every single day, I wouldn't have survived, I wouldn't have been standing here if I didn't have you!'' A single tear rolled down his face. ''I came back for you, Love.''

The rage and anger boiled in your blood, tears streaming down your face as you fought for a grip. All the guilt you had felt in the past two years, all the tears that had been shed and all the pain you had felt was all for nothing. You had suffered for nothing. And despite his meaningful words, anger clouded your mind and you needed a way to let that out. 

You inhaled shakily, your hands curling up into fists as your lips formed a tight line. You stormed over to him and raised your hand, ready to give him the punch he deserved. But he stopped you. 

His hand grabbed yours, pulling you against him. You instantly went limp in his arms and started to cry uncontrollably. 

Every emotion you had felt this night and the many nights before came rushing out and there was no holding them back. And as he held you in his arms, his familiar scent completely enveloping you, you finally felt at home again. 

This. You had missed it so much. All your prayers, all your wishes had been heard and they had finally come true. The man you loved was back, holding you, calming you. 

It had been so hard without him. There had been so many times when you were dangerously close to giving up and you were so happy that you didn't. All the pain, all the misery had led to this moment. This one precious moment. You simply couldn't find it within you to feel angry anymore.

Your tears ceased to a stop and you regained strength in your limbs. 

Sherlock carefully pushed you back a little, hands firmly gripping your shoulders. ''I meant what I said, (Y/N). I truly am sorry,'' he confessed, tears brimming his eyes. 

''Promise me you'll stay.'' 

He nodded. ''Forever, I promise.'' His hands found your waist and pulled you back against him, holding you tightly as his lips slammed against yours in a passionate daze. 

The two years without you had left him hungry for your touch and now, finally, he could satisfy that hunger again. 

No words could describe the mix of strong emotions he felt, but it felt fantastic. He poured every ounce of passion he could find into the kiss and you mirrored his energy. You were finally kissing the man you loved again. The man you thought you had lost.

And as the dark cloud drifted away, the moon cast its pale light back onto the city, defeating the darkness of the night and your heart.