Behind The Scenes

Chapter 13

           

"So, the Cat's out of the bag?" Are the first words Dinah says when Camila walks through their bus door. "Get it? Because the secret was about Cat and now Lauren knows? Come on that was funny!" Dinah laughs at her own joke when there is no response from Camila.

She turns towards the girl who just stands in the doorway with a blank expression on her face. It's scary. Camila's eyes are usually so expressive, but right now, they are unreadable. Dinah can't see a single thing in those brown eyes. Either that, or it's too many things to determine.

Fuck. She had been so sure that everything was going to go okay. Camila had Lauren's heart and Lauren had Camila's, in Dinah's mind, there was no way that things wouldn't turn out in Camila's favor, especially after Camila had explained everything to Lauren.

At worst, Dinah assumed that maybe Lauren would be angry for a day or two before coming to her senses and realizing that Camila hadn't exactly had a choice in the matter. However, but the look on Camila's face, Dinah can tell that whatever happened, was much worse than Lauren being mad for a day.

"Mila?" She immediately gets to her feet, running over to her best friend.

Up close, Camila looks even worse. She's paler than Dinah has ever seen. Even more pale than the one time Camila had passed out after getting her blood drawn at the school, and that was saying something. Her chest is moving up and down rapidly, like she's trying to hide the fact that it hurts to breathe and her hands are shaking at her side. She looks like she's about to fall over so Dinah reaches out and grabs Camila's arm, hoping to hold her up.

"Mila, what's wrong, you're scaring me." Dinah tells the girl honestly, but Camila's eyes don't even meet her own. She shows no recognition towards Dinah's voice at all.

Camila's knees seem to buckle and Dinah is glad that she grabbed onto the girl, because she is able to stop Camila from hitting the ground, instead pulls the girl over to the couch and forces Camila to sit down. She's never seen Camila like this. It's scary. Scarier than she'd like to admit.

She isn't really sure what to do. She just watches Camila for a moment as the girl slumps into the couch, her breathing labored. Dinah almost thinks that Camila might be having a panic attack like she had a few weeks ago, but something tells her that she isn't. Either way, she doesn't know how to fix it.

"M-Mani!" Dinah yells in a slight panic. Normani has always been the more levelheaded of the two, the one to think rationally. She'd know what to do.....or at least Dinah hoped she would know. Her voice comes out shaky and she clears her throat before calling again. "Mani!" It's loud enough that Dinah knows even if Normani has her headphones in, she would hear something.

Soon enough Normani is stumbling into the room, her large headphones resting on the back of her neck, hair disheveled, shirt hanging off one shoulder, and breathless. She must have been asleep. "Are you okay? What's wrong?" Normani says, obviously panicked that something had happened to Dinah.

"I'm fine." Dinah assures. "But Mila...." Dinah turns towards the girl who now has her eyes closed and her fists clenched. She's pretty sure Camila is shaking with emotion. So many things wanting, no needing, to be released. Camila's been bottling her whole life. Every single thing that Cat has made her feel, and now, she's reached the brim. Years of pent up emotion threatened to burst.

Normani hurries over, kneeling in front of Camila and placing a hesitant hand on Camila's clenched fist. "Mila?" She whispers, not wanting to further upset the girl.

Camila shakes her head back and forth, almost violently. Her breathing gets heavier and her knuckles turn white. She can't focus on anything else right now. Not Normani, not how bad she wants to let everything out, not how broken her heart feels in her chest. Only on keeping everything inside.