distraction; jg + sw

ten

"i don't know, okay?" i raised my voice.

"what about you? do you still?" sammy asked jack.

"sam, you know—" he started.

"wait. you had feelings for me? and didn't tell me?" i asked, starting to get angry and more confused by the second.

"avery, we were kids. i wasn't even sure what my feelings were" he explained.

"so, we both liked eachother and didn't do anything? our whole lives would've been different" i almost whisper to myself.

"yeah it would've. but avery, i care about you—" jack held my shoulders.

"no you don't jack, you don't care about me" i yelled, "you've put me through so much shit the past couple of months. it's like you don't even acknowledge my feelings" i pointed at his chest with force.

"av—" he stepped closer.

"no" i stepped back, water now forming in my eyes, "maybe you were right. maybe they weren't feelings. i'm happy for you jack, you know what you want and your going for it. i guess i wish i was more like you" i said in a soft tone, referring to natalie.

"i didn't mean it like that, i just meant that i was embarrassed back then. to love my bestfriend" he explained.

normally when i would've heard him say he loved me my heart would flutter out of my chest but i know better now. i realize that it's past tense and that he's moved on. i need to do the same. or at least try.

"sammy" i turned to him, choosing by not to continue my previous conversation with jack.

"yes?" he looked at me.

"i'm sorry. i led you on and treated you like shit. i know how that feels and i'm sorrry" i said maturely.

"avery, you don't need to apologize. you don't owe me anything" he smiled.

"i have to go, natalie needs me" jack put his phone back in his pocket.

"i thought you weren't going to leave no matter what" sammy stepped towards him.

"sam" i scolded him.

"no it's okay, av" jack held his hand up towards me.

"i'll always be here for avery, my best friend. but it seems like you two have made up just fine. and in terms of making things clear to for everyone to understand, well that's just not happening" he told him.

which he was right, i guess. we all have to be open about our thoughts and feelings. i thought we all used to all tell eachother everything and well, we obviously never did.

"we cool?" jack asked sammy and held out his hand.

"yeah, i guess" sam nodded, obviously not wanting to be civil.

"goodnight avery" he kissed my cheek and gave me a friendly smile before leaving.

"night" i hollered, not sure if he heard me in time.

i ended up asking sammy to stay for dinner, which he happily agreed to. after getting some takeout chinese we just talked and laughed. it was nice not fighting with someone.

once our movie finished i noticed he was almost asleep on my lap. he can drink liquor better than anyone i know but wine puts him straight to sleep.

"sam" i tried to get his attention as he hummed, "you can stay here if you want" i notified him, while brushing his hair back with my hands.

i wondered, how is his hair so soft? he's bleached and dyed it numerous times, i wanted to know his secret.

"no, that's okay. thanks though, i should be getting home" he stood up and rubbed his eyes like a cute little kid.

"you sure?" i asked in shock.

i never knew sammy to turn down a stay at a women's place.

"yeah i'm sure. baby steps, right?" he asked.

"baby steps" i smiled.

"i'll see you" he said as he finally found his keys.

"call me when you get home" i told him sternly.

"yes mom" he chuckled, "i'll see you avery" he kissed my forehead before leaving me alone in the living room.

i know, i just had feelings for jack and now i'm with sammy. but sammy is a good guy, he's my friend and i care about him. plus, he's not an engaged man.

i tossed my phone in my hands for about fifteen minutes until my phone finally rang. i didn't want to go to sleep until sam called me. i knew he would, unless he fell asleep before he got there.

"hello" i answered, a little too eager.

"i'm home" i heard sammy's tired voice.

"good, now get some sleep" i chuckled.

"goodnight avery" he said as i could feel his smile through the phone.

"goodnight sam" i smiled and hung up the phone.

after receiving the call i was waiting for i brushed my teeth and headed to bed.

was gonna make a dramatic ending but we've had enough drama for this chapter haha.

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-lyss