G H O S T

Chapter-012

Shame.

Noun•
A painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.

Ryan sighed deeply as he looked to the blonde male who was staring at his pale complexion. The tear stained cheeks shined brightly in the light and though he was pale you could make out the water marks. He watched as his friend gave a sniff and returned to the bed where Ryan waited for him.

"Bryce I'm so sorry."

"For what?"

"For...that. For this. For everything that's happened here lately. It's all my fault." He looked away from the blonde and swallowed the lump in his throat. "I should've just accepted the fact that I was not a saint. Never could be...instead, I put you in danger."

Bryce stayed silent as he looked at the ghost beside him, a look of pity scattering on his face. "Ryan...you remember the day you saved my life? The day I stepped in front of that car?" He watched the male look at him with a raised brown so he continued, "I stepped in front of that car on purpose. I tried to kill myself...I was ten and I kissed a boy. The sinful part was that I enjoyed it and so did the boy I kissed. My mother saw and nearly flipped out, we were on our way home...from then I thought of how the world judges people. My mother and father judged me for doing something I enjoyed and it made me want to leave this world in hopes of finding a better one. I believed there was a restart button back then." Ryan kept a straight face as he watched the blonde chuckle light heartedly.

"Bryce you don't have to explain..."

"No," he sighed out. "I do."

"Bryce..."

"When you saved my life I had a reality check. We are given a due date and everything is planned out but yet we do stupid things and tamper with it. It's like when girls take an apple and twist the top to see what letter their lovers first letter is. Maybe, their latter was A and when they twisted it they got L causing their lover to change, and if they do it again they tamper with the same thing. You probably would've died of old age if you hadn't saved me. That right there twisted your whole path. You tampered with what was to be..."

"Tch, honestly I think saving your life was the most...decent death I would've ever gotten." Ryan looked at the blonde and gave a frown, "Bryce I'm not the cleanest man you'll ever meet. You check my background and it's a little clean. Truth be told I'm a full on sinner. I cuss, I used to drink, smoke, and do things no man should do. I've screwed people over too many times...but I've done something worse which is why I'm here. Being...gay isn't as bad as saints put it. I mean–in God's eye it's deadly but...I don't see how you can hate someone for being who they are or want to be. Loving someone they want to love. It makes no sense. If I could be in control I'd change the rules but—"

Bryce's phone rang causing their conversation to cut short. They both looked at the phone and a apologetic smile crossed the blondes lips as he grabbed it and answered it, "Hello?....Luke! Hey! Yeah um, I'm not in town. Won't be for a while. I took a break. No...what?? When? No...are you serious?! Crap! Um um um!" Seeing the blonde panic made him stand to his feet and raise his brows with a look of confusion on his face. "Okay! Definitely!"