not my type ↬ frerard

10

tw: suicide, brief mentions of child abuse.

dear fucking whoever,

    if you find this there is a 99% chance you and i were friends at one point. i say friends instead of family because those fuckers are long gone. in fact, i never really even had friends. i had folks i coexisted with comfortably. mikey, and pete, for example. they were the closest to friends i ever had.

but i'm getting off track. if you never knew me, feel free to disregard this. my name is frank iero.

and there is a reason you're reading this. i have killed myself.

i'm tired of running. i'm tired of running from the past and ex-lovers and people i trusted far too much. i am tired.

let me rest; let the air escape my lungs and let blood escape my skin. let the life fade from my eyes. do not save me. do not let me "have a second chance."

i have been given far too many chances. and it's not that i'm the one wasting my chances- everyone else is wasting theirs. i'm tired of people. i'm tired of being lied to. i'm tired of running... i am tired.

i'm sick of my "second chances" being poisoned by the existence of the wicked. i'm sick of my entire life being one big "second chance." i'm sick of "second chances."

i was always told that i had a way with words, and i'm willing to admit that even if i had no other talents, at least i had this.

so let me explain it the best that i can.

i am tired, and sick, and i am beaten down. i have cried and i have screamed; i have fought and i have given up; i have tried, and tried, and i have failed.

i have been scared of death and i have been on the verge of it. i thought for awhile, with all of what could be described as "luck," i could not be killed. i have survived beatings and car crashes and even starvation. i have even survived the edge of my own blade.

but one too many times have i seen backs turned to me, one too many times have i been betrayed. there is no escaping the inevitability of failure, even in suicide. i was bound to fail.

i was bound to fail when my parents never loved me and when i dropped out of highschool and when i tried to kill myself and when gerard left me and when i ran away. i will always fail.

no college, no marriage, no family, no career. no frank.

my name is frank iero, i'm a failure, and i'm another face lost among the crowd of suicide.

don't miss me.

xøfrnk

a/n: in no way do i condone suicide or self harm. if you are in need of help, or you know someone who is, please reach out. you don't have to fight alone.