not my type ↬ frerard

9

chat with .diluted. and milkfriend.

.diluted.: past tense?

milkfriend: yes.

.diluted.: but i mean nothing to you now

milkfriend: i wouldn't say that

.diluted.: you wouldn't go to my funeral

milkfriend: you won't be having one anytime soon, i'd hope

.diluted.: that's the nicest thing you've said to me since we broke up

milkfriend: doubted

milkfriend: and yes i would go to your funeral

milkfriend: i would cry if something happened to you

.diluted.: would you put a red rose on my coffin

milkfriend: that's an odd question. but i would if that's a request

milkfriend: but you're going to live a long life, Frank

milkfriend: and you're gonna enjoy it, you just have to get past whatever is blocking you from a bright future

milkfriend: you have potential, Frank

.diluted.: i'm nothing and my future holds nothing

.diluted.: i am not like you.

.diluted.: i'm not an artist, i'm not in college, i can't sing, i'm not headed somewhere

.diluted.: you have your future planned out, and that's a privilege

.diluted.: i have nothing.

.diluted.: im the kid who flunked every class and got his ass beat at home, i'm the kid who got picked on but it went unnoticed, i'm the kid with no talent, i'm the kid who trusted too much

.diluted.: and you were the one thing i could hold on to, you gave me hope, i saw a future with you

milkfriend: you don't need me Frank, you never did. you can find a future on your own, you're just not trying

.diluted.: im not trying????

.diluted.: i tried for years! i tried to be the optimist and i tried to have my future planned out, i tried to be like you

.diluted.: but let's be fucking realistic, i wasn't even supposed to make it this far

.diluted.: i can't even go to college, i dropped out of high school and i fucking ran

.diluted.: i ran so fucking far, i sat on the side of a road in the middle of fucking nowhere and i thought i was going to die that night

.diluted.: and i was fucking ready. i had nothing to do anymore

.diluted.: im done running, im a fucking adult and i will not be treated like a lost child anymore

.diluted.: and one final thing.

.diluted.: you can leave as many roses on my coffin and shed as many tears as you want but it won't bring me back.

message read at 5:20am.