Corrupted

Chapter Seven

Cause when I’m with you, I’m at home.

My dreadful walk home is nothing but…. Well, dreadful. I bolted right after everything happened and left Gemma and Derek standing there. She’s probably going to kill me later, but I’m not concerned with it. I’m just trying to figure out why I feel so numb.

My head hurts, my body physically hurts, and my feet are tired from walking, but I feel nothing. My emotions are just shut off and I kind of wish it was like this all the time. I’m not sad, but I’m not happy. I feel nothing and when I feel nothing I don’t have to feel pain.

My head whips around to the sounds of yelling. I freeze in place as the three guys come running towards me. What if I just stand here and let them beat me? No one would even give a shit. I could just let it all end; let them beat me until I’m dead.

But I’m Dylan Hayes and I don’t give up. That’s what Ashton and Stella taught me: don’t give up and good things will come. I flip them off, just to anger them and take off running. I’ve spent a lot of time running away from my father or the cops after I stole something, so I know how to lose them with no problem.

I weave in and out of buildings, alleys, streets for half an hour and when I turn around and wait, they’re nowhere to be found. With a huff, I walk towards Adam’s house and feel anxiety creep us as I get closer.

His house looks different today. Standing in his front yard and staring at it, it feels different, uninviting, but then again it probably is for me. I take a deep breath and push open the front door. No one is around, so I quietly creep into the living room where everyone is seated; oh great.

I freeze like a deer in headlights with they all turn to look at me. Gemma sits on the couch next to Adam with Sydney beside her. Adam’s parent’s sit in the love seat diagonal from the couch, making it look like I’m walking into another intervention.

“Oh thank God he’s home,” Adam’s Mom breathes.

“You had us worried, son,” his Dad says. They both stand up to hug me tight. He smells like leather and outside, but she smells like fruit and leaves from the fall. A tear streams down my face, but I quickly wipe it away. They actually care. They even called me son and here I was thinking no one would even notice my absence.

“What happened to you?” she asks.

“I’m sorry,” I gush. “I…”

“Adam told us you just disappeared.”

I risk a glance at Adam who’s glaring at me, telling me silently to keep my mouth shut. I shrink away and stare back up at her big brown eyes, that match everyone else’s in this family. “I’m sorry.”

“Are you doing okay? We know you’ve had some problems in the past… with your father and everything.”

I flinch a little. “I’m fine.” I hug myself and stare at her ear instead of her eyes.

“Are you getting bad again?” she whispers.

 

Are you getting bad again?

Are you going insane again?

Is all the pain back?

Are you still fucking up?

Do you need help?

 

All the questions swirl around in my head until I’m sick to my stomach and become dizzy. I’m not getting bad again; I swear. I stumble around, shaking my head no, mumbling, “I’m not, I swear.” I don’t know if they can hear me; I think I’m slurring. I run my shoulder into a wall, but I keep going with my hands stretched out in front of me, feeling my way through the kitchen until I find the trashcan. I throw my head inside and hurl up all my breakfast from this morning. After that, I slouch against the wall, sliding down to the floor with my head on my knees that are pulled up to my chest. I wrap my arms around my head and knees and try to block out all their voices.