Unthinkable (Completed)

Chapter Thirteen

Silence.

We both been quiet since we woke up about an hour ago. I was staring at the TV even though I wasn't really watching it and Shawn was staring up at the ceiling. I know he is a very confused person right now. Last night he officially let go of his longtime girlfriend and because they were finally done she decides to reveal her truth that broke his heart. Then here he comes to me looking for a shoulder to cry on, but instead I gave him my virginity to take. At the moment it felt great, but I feel like he regrets doing it.

I felt him sitting up in the bed, had his back on the headboard. Turning on my side I look up at him.

"What's wrong?"

Blinking his eyes twice he let out a small chuckle and shook his head.

"What's not wrong?"

I'm guessing his referring to Rosario. Sitting up I scooted closer to him so that I could lay my head on his shoulder.

"It's going to be okay, I know right now you are angry at her, but in due time you will forgive her and move on."

I heard him mumble that he will never forgive her but I chose not to comment back because I wasn't in his position. I just don't want him to grieve over this forever.

Shawn took his hand and begin to rub on my arm up and down, the feeling of it almost caused me to go back to sleep until I heard him speak again.

"How do you feel about last night?" Thank goodness he brought it up first.

Shifting my position a little bit I started to wonder how I did feel. I mean I won't lie losing my virginity to him was painful at first, but then the pleasure kick in afterwards and it was an amazing feeling. But under the circumstances it was kind of too soon. But do I regret it........I honestly don't. Last night was great.

"Bey did you hear me?"

"Yea sorry I did. I enjoyed last night I know I probably should have waited but at the time I didn't think. I wouldn't change what happen though. What about you?"

This time he was silent but I think his silence meant a bad thing.

"Honestly Bey I enjoyed it myself however I just got out of a relationship. I thought me and you was going to chill for a while before we took it to the next level. I wanted to make sure there was no more feelings for Rosario before I pursued a relationship with you."

Damn now I feel bad for rushing into sex. He's making it seem like he about to cut all ties with me.

"But I will say this though I know what I want and that's you, but you do think it's possible to take things slow? I wanna make sure things are great between us before we get in a relationship." Shawn looked at me and displayed a serious face.

"Yes Shawn we can take this slow." He kissed me on the forehead and ask for a towel and toothbrush.

We both took care of ourselves in the bathroom. All I kept thinking about as I took my shower is our conversation. I know I agreed to take things slow due to the situation, but I don't want to be one of those girls who lose their virginity and become stuck to the guy. I know I have strong feelings for Shawn, but sometimes I feel as though his feelings for me isn't as strong. What if he decides to cut me off and move on with somebody that is more experience than me? What if he is just using me as a clutch to get over Rosario?

"Yo yall water gets hot as fuck." Shawn claim when he came in the kitchen. I was cooking us some waffles and eggs.

"Yea I know I love it" Scrambling the eggs up, I felt Shawn creep up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist. He planted kisses on my neck. Now didn't this fool suggest we take it slow?