Conversations With My Love (boyxboy)

42. Declan's Secret Journal (4)

Pierre: I'm at the orphanage. Well, I'm standing in front of it. I'm waiting to enter actually. I don't know why but I have been waiting for about ten minutes now. People will start to think that I'm weird if I continue to stay here.

I frowned and read the message that Pierre just sent me a second time. I was at the park, sitting on my usual bench with my legs crossed on it, ready to read my journal. Everyone happened to be present at my house today and honestly, I didn't feel like remaining among them so I came here. I was just about to start my reading when my love suddenly texted me.

DECLAN: Okay, what's wrong?

PIERRE: Oh, I don't know, you tell me about it. What's wrong with you?

He got me more than confused.

DECLAN: What do you mean? I'm not the one standing in front of an orphanage.

PIERRE: Can you stop doing that please? You're playing dumb but I know that you are avoiding me. Don't you dare deny it.

Somehow, I could feel the aggressiveness of Pierre.

DECLAN: Love, really, I don't know what you are talking about.

PIERRE: Oh, let me lighten you then. I went to see you at the cupcake shop a few times but you rarely looked at me in the eyes. Lately, you didn't talk to me at all and really, those fake smiles that you gave me from time to time weren't really comforting.

I let out a sigh and flopped my head back to stare at the sky. I did not think that he noticed any change in my behavior. Really, he had been acting so naturally lately that I did not think that it would matter to him if my way of behaving changed towards him or not.

Before I got the chance to reply to him, he suddenly called me. I stared at my phone, not sure if I should reply or not. If I didn't reply to him, he would think that I was really avoiding him but if I did reply to him, that would ruin my plan of actually avoiding him.

I groaned in frustration with my stupid logic and then I finally took the call.

"What is it, love?" I asked him.

"Why are you avoiding me like this?" he exclaimed in my ear and I grimaced, pulling my phone away for one brief moment. "Why? Just why are you running away from me?!"

"Ask yourself that question," I exclaimed back at him, incredulous, "I'm not running away. You are, I'm just imitating you. I tried to have an important talk with you but all you did was ignore me and act like if nothing had happened so now don't get mad at me because I'm doing the same."

"An important talk," he repeated and he seemed confused. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"Yeah, right, you don't know," I huffed in disbelief. "So we have nothing to talk about then. Goodbye."

"No wait," he exclaimed before I could hang up. "Okay, I get it. I know what's wrong."

"Oh, really?"

"Declan," he started with a slight pause. "It's not what you think it is."

"You don't know what I'm thinking about."

"No, I do actually," he protested and he sighed. "You are thinking about what nearly happened at Annie's house. You are thinking about the fact that we...that we nearly kissed."

"Oh, thank god! You finally said it," I told him with sarcasm. "I thought that you would continue to pretend that nothing happened."

"But nothing happened," he said like if it was obvious, "We didn't kiss. I know that I gave you the impression that I wanted you to kiss me but that's not it."