chapter 17

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note as of 6/6/18- sorry for any plot holes! i unpublished chapter 16 which i found embarrassing and it was also fairly insignificant to the story line. read on! i love you!

WARNING:MENTION OF SUICIDE

Soft sobs bring me out of my sleep, and I attempt to bring Mitch closer to me, but my arms grasp nothing as I realize he isn't there. I sit up, and in the dark I see a figure hunched in a ball on the side of the bed, cries escaping him as his back shudders.

What is it now? Did I say something in my sleep? My vision adjusts to the dark more, and I see Mitch with his knees pulled up to his chest, his head between them. More strangled wails leave him.

I sit up, and edge my way to his side of the bed where he's crouched. He must not have noticed me, for when I wrapped my arm around him he nearly jumped off the bed.

"Mitch, baby." I coo as I wrap him in my arms. I can practically feel him soak into my touch. "What's wrong?" Mitch stays silent. "You can talk to me." I whisper. He shakes his head against my chest, but begins to speak.

"I-I'm scared." He manages through cries. What could he be scared of? Scared of me? "I don't w..want Mike to l-leave me." He breaks down again, soaking the front of my shirt.

"Mitchy, why on earth would he leave you?" I ask. It hurts me to see him so broken, to see him so damaged. I grip onto him tight, like if I didn't, he could slip away from my grasp.

"He..He is going to leave me just like my mother did." The sobs haven't ceased. He just cries harder.

"Shh, shh. No, he won't." I reassure him.

"He could!" Mitch wails. "My mother left me in the blink of an eye, and she had raised me. Mike doesn't have any connection to me! He could drop me in a second!"

"Mitch. You need to tell me why you think he would leave you." Tears start to cloud over my own eyes. I just want Mitch to be happy.

"Because, Scott! I've finally understood who I- who I am.." The cries have stopped, now he's just choking back rising sobs.

"What the hell are you trying to say?" I wish he would just spit it out.

"I'm trying to say that I am gay!" He yells. The room stays quiet for a moment. "Even if what we did earlier was when we were drunk, I still felt connected to you. I didn't feel like it was just a drunk hookup. Look, I've been infatuated with you since you came here, and I doubted myself. But now I know for sure."

I don't respond. I'm still figuring out what this has to do with Mike.

"I guess you didn't feel the same, then.." Mitch shrugs out of my arms. Fuck, I hesitated for too long.

"No, Mitch! I did. I definitely did not see it as a drunk hookup! I'm just trying to understand why this has to do with Mike abandoning you." My voice cracks, and I let the tears fall. "Why would anyone leave someone like you?"

Mitch looks up at me, our foreheads touching, us breathing the same air.

"He wouldn't accept me." He states as another tear falls from his eye.

"How do you know that?" He doesn't respond for a long time.

"He had a daughter, before I came here." He whispers. He had a daughter? "It was his daughter, his own blood. He told me all about her. Her name was Amelia." His voice cracks again. He clears his throat, struggling to continue.

"He told me that she came out as a lesbian to him when she was sixteen, around nine years ago. He packed her things and told her not to come back and live with him until she became 'normal' again. She was already depressed, he said, because of her upbringing with him. You know, being in a gang and all." I nod.

"Amelia jumped in front of a moving train three days later. She didn't have anywhere to go." More tears escape both of our eyes, our foreheads still touching. "Now, that is why I'm afraid. If he was able to kick out his own daughter, he'd be able to kick out me. We aren't close, we aren't related. I'd be booted."

"You'll be okay. We'll be okay. It'll just have to stay our secret. Okay, Mitchy?"

He nods, and we lay back down, his cries finally stopping.

All I want is for him to be happy.

Thanks for reading! This chapter is very sad, very emotional, I know. I feel so bad for Mitch and Amelia, I'll try not to let Mitch end up like her. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, please keep voting and commenting! Stay f'cute!

~Cassie :)

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