loving him loving her [bokuto koutarou]

five;

-

"tell me everything!"

(y/n) might be saying this, but it's not at all what she wants.

hearing all of the cute things bokuto has done for her best friend just makes her heart hurt more, but there is no way she can let (friend's name) know this. she can't ruin her friend's potential love-life just because of her own lingering feelings.

nonetheless, (friend's name) tells everything that happened in the short (though, it surely felt long) time that they were gone.

watching her friend look so happy makes (y/n) feel so guilty. how could she even think about wanting to be in her place? (friend's name) is one of her favorite people in her life, and she wants nothing more than for her to be happy and loved. (friend's name) is finally getting that. be happy, (y/n).

"(y/n), you there?" (friend's name) asks, waving a hand in front of (y/n)'s face trying to wake her from her selfish thoughts.

"yeah, yeah. i'm here," she says, trying her best to make her smile seem genuine. it's not that hard though because seeing her friend happy does make herself happy too.

"okay! so after we got our icecream and after he dropped (favorite flavor) -sorry again- we decided to buy some more for you and akaashi, but bokuto said that akaashi was lactose intolerant, so he ate his too! i wonder if that was a lie though... do you know if akaashi is lactose intolerant?"

"hmm?" (friend's name) spoke so many words so quickly that she barely absorbed any of that. "akaashi is lactose intolerant?"

(friend's name) sighs. "so, i'm guessing you don't know either. anyway..." then she continued to ramble about her night with a light in her eyes that (y/n) has never seen before.

even though (friend's name) has only known bokuto for a few hours, she definitely seems to like him. (y/n) is so glad that her best friend has someone she's interested in, but why does it have to be him? stop being selfish, (y/n).

"Then you saw how he kissed me hand. He kissed my hand, (y/n)! What the hell!" (friend's name) starts squealing with excitement, completely oblivious to (y/n)'s sad eyes watching her bright ones.

-

the next day, bokuto would approach (y/n) and (friend's name) during school hours on the way to their next classes.

it was quite sudden. (y/n) was just walking beside her friend, complaining about how tired she was when suddenly, (friend's name) is a foot up in the air as bokuto grabs her under the arms and swings her around. "i haven't seen you all day, (friend's name)!"

"well, we are learning today, bokuto," (y/n) says, watching her friend and her crushes' interaction. "like... every other school day."

(friend's name) starts giggling when bokuto finally sets her down. (y/n) tries her hardest not to show her emotions on her face but inside she is screaming because just how strong is this boy? he lifted (friend's name) in the air for a longer time than expected, and his shirt was tight against his biceps and god, help me.

the other emotion was, of course, jealousy, but even that feeling was slowly replaced by her internally freaking out over this boy.

"are you watching our practice again, (y/n)?" akaashi then appears from behind bokuto and smiles. "i'm guessing that (friend's name) is."

"you bet she is!"

"you bet i am!"

they both start giggling when they notice they had said basically the same thing at the same time. wow, they must be meant to be. that thought didn't sit well with (y/n) though.

"i- i think that i might sit this one out, guys," she admits, awkwardly placing her hair behind her ear. (friend's name) looks away from bokuto's grinning face towards her friend's frowning one, her own smile slowly faltering.

"w-what? why not?" she asks. she was counting on (y/n) being there as emotional support. not to mention, it was boring for just her to watch the volleyball practice. (friend's name) doesn't even like volleyball.

"i have homework, and (favorite anime) is calling my name."

"you like (favorite anime)?" bokuto asks, his grin somehow growing larger as he crosses his arms across his chest. (y/n) tries not to let her eyes linger on his body, but also refuses to make eye contact. there is a good chance all of her emotions towards him will appear on her face, and she can't have that.

"y-yeah, it's my favorite."

"nice! akaashi, she likes your favorite anime!" bokuto exclaims, shoving his shoulder with his own. "bonding!"

"bokuto-san, that is your favorite ani-"

"hahah, what!? i don't- i don't watch anime, akaash- i don't," he says, starting to fumble over his words when he notices (friend's name)'s curious gaze on him. bokuto gives akaashi a desperate look.

"oh, you said (favorite anime)?" akaashi says, monotonously faking interest with a bit too much exaggeration. "i thought you said a different one. yeah, that's definitely my favorite. not bokuto-san's."

"maybe after practice he could watch with you!" (friend's name) offers, and bokuto immediately agrees, desperate for some alone time with his crush.

(y/n) could totally see what was happening here, and she wasn't sure that she liked it.