It's Been Killing Me ➢ Camren

XVIII: A much needed vacation.

I smiled, "Will do." I answered, nodding my head as I did. I then heard groaning beside me and I chuckled in amusement. I diverted my attention to Camila. She had her limp jutted out, pouting adorably at me with her chin resting on my shoulder. Biting my lip, I pecked her lips multiply time and her smiled became impossibly wider than before. "Anyway, have you been sleeping enough? You don't skip dinner or anything do you? You're not hanging out with the wrong crowd again are you?"

Chuckling, I cut him off, "I'm doing fine, Dad. I already told you stories about my friends and they will kick my ass if I do something stupid. They're great to me, really." I told him sincerely. I stuck my tongue out at Camila when she gave me a sly smile. "If that's the case... I'm happy that you have them beside you. I can already tell that their nice and responsible people telling by your stories." I quietly chuckled and rolled my eyes when he said 'responsible'.

'He said you guys are responsible.' I mouthed quietly to Camila as I keep chuckling. Camila gasped, pinching my arm when she noticed me sarcastically roll my eyes and I flinched away. "What's with all the noise?" He asked curiously. I could hear him chuckle quietly. "Ugh... Nothing Camila is just being so childish." I playfully groan with a smirk plastered on my face, and Camila just rolled her eyes at me.

"Haha, I see that you guys are getting along really well, which is good." I listened to him talk, biting my lip to try to stop a small smile from appearing on my face. Pretending is much harder than I thought. "So I've heard of what you did. I think it was quite admirable for you to do. I'm proud but I doubt your mother will be happy hearing about it. Even if she's gone, she wouldn't want you to get hurt. But I know that she will still be happy, knowing how much you love her."

"Please let's not talk about this right now. I'm really not proud of what I did to the girl but I can't help but love the satisfaction that came after, you know." I responded, smiling slightly when Camila started to open my palm and interlock our hands together. She intensely stared at our interlocked hands, continuing to play and wiggle my fingers. Adorable, I thought.

"With that aside, I can tell you have something else to say." I urged. "Well..." His voice held uncertainty and hesitation in them, making me even more intrigued yet confused. "Your Abuela called." My eyes widened at the news. I became more excited. I haven't heard anything from her since... I came out.

I smiled from ear to ear and held my phone with both of my hands, gripping it tightly in excitement. Camila was surprised but stayed quiet. My Abuela may have not accepted me when I came out but I still love her. I wish that she could have changed her mind back then. It hurts me knowing that my own Abuela doesn't approve of the people that I love.

Sometimes she even goes as far as to avoid going to family get together's because apparently I'm the 'sinful granddaughter of hers' and she doesn't want to see me. It hurts but I don't let that affect me because I keep hoping that one day abuela will see me as her granddaughter again. I'm still the same person as before and I wish that she could just see that once.

"Hi Abuela." I smiled nervously, playing with my fingers as I look down at the ground. My Abuela stood outside the door with a giant smile plastered on her face, finally happy to see her granddaughter visiting her. I stood silently outside the door, my nervousness not leaving. Abuela immediately embraced me in a tight hug, completely taking me by surprise before hugging her back.

I couldn't help but smile widely, even though I can still feel the fear swarming my mind. What if she starts hating me after this? I don't think I'll be able to handle that. I just can't keep hiding this part of me any longer. "What a nice surprise! What brings you here Mija?" Abuela said, pulling me inside her adorable little home.

I looked around the house, feeling a familiar sense of nostalgia hit me. I remember sitting on the same couch as my Abuela tells me stories about her life. I found her stories so fascinating that whenever I came over, the first thing that I ask is that if she can tell me another story. My Abuela was always happy to do so.