Wristbands L.h

chemo

Luke Pov

I walk into the house , Michael and the guys leave me to talk to Violet who i notice is asleep on our bed . She hugs penguin to her chest , tears falling down her cheeks landing on the pillow so i sit on the bed tapping her shoulder .

I should't of left her like this , if i knew i wouldnt of ever left her this way but she was selfless and wanted me to chase my dreams but it means nothing if i dont have her . Her eyes open wide awake , i wipe away her tears kissing her forehead .

Laying in the covers Violet instantly moves to put her head on my chest letting go of peiguin , making me smile i whisper " hi " she starts crying . Rubbing her back i whisper " im never leaving you like this again why didnt you tell me?" Violet whispers " i wanted you to go for dreams despite me being ill and wanting you here ."

The tubes lay under nose , i kiss her cheek whilst wiping the tears away she whispers " i missed you so much " the tears still falling . Even with penguin to hug at night its never enough , she needs me as much as i need her in my life physically .

I whisper " me too but im back so go to sleep im not going anywhere promise " Violet nods whispers " i cant sleep not with the tubes in " why didn't she ever call me? i feel like a dick for not being there in moments like this . Kissing her head i whisper " okay well we could watch some tv shows " her mood lightening up abit after the mention of that .

Violet nods resting her head against my chest again , her hands feel cold not like usual they are usually really warm i guess its to do with the oxygen tank or the cancer . Shrugging it off i ask " when's the chemo?" she says " tomorrow " looking guilty , i whisper " its okay ill go with you " smiling at her alittle .

Her eyes focus on to the tv show shes been watching whilst ive been away for months , its really confusing but i listen to Violet telling me about it . Its her first sesson of chemo , so i can imagine the fixed emotions running through her right now .

But because i think Violet isnt going to like a wig , im bringing a beanie with me well one of mine that she usually wears . My mum is coming over after the chemo to see how everything went , i think Violet is gonna break down etc at the hospital .

Non of this is easy , treatments sometimes dont work and neither does chemo its hard to know if everything is going to be okay . The doctor said either the nurse or me can shave her hair off on her head but i dont think i can . That would break my heart .

But id do it for Violet , if she seriously wants me to do it then i will for her and support her on everything . The guys said to call them if Violet gets upset or everything gets too much for the both of us .

*NEXT DAY*

Violet

Getting up from my bed , i go into the bathroom brushing my teeth whilst Luke is still trying to move from his spot . My phone buzzes , the guys text me saying ' good luck ' theres like a thousand of emotions running through me right now .

The worst is the shaving of my hair , i wonder if Luke will still look at me the same again after all the chemo and treatments . He walks into the bathroom kissing my cheek and grabbing the tooth brush , Luke says " wait for me i wanna carry you everywhere ."

Going into my bed room i change into sweat pants , a jumper and top sliding on my converse too . We both get in the car , i put on the heating turning on Jess Glynne humming to ' dont be so hard on yourself ' seeing Luke smile at me .

Getting to the hospital was the worst , the empty pit in my stomach getting bigger as we spoke to my doctor and nurse . The nurse lead me to my room she asks " is Luke going to shave your hair?" i nod hoping he will , she leaves the room .

The stool is sat in the middle of the room waiting for me , changing into the hospital gown i take a seat on it noticing Luke's hand shaking . I joke " good job your not giving me a hair cut " he laughs says " dont tempt me " grabbing the razor .

Tears rise in my eyes , realising its now real but i dont feel a thing just my head starting to feel cold . A tear drops onto the floor , Luke says " almost done its okay ive got something for you too " i hope its not a wig like Michael suggested once .

A laugh escapes my mouth remembering the day we spoke about that , he said maybe we should get you a rainbow wig or green . Luke says " its not a rainbow wig either " making me fake pout , he laughs smiling alittle .

The hair sits circled around my stool , i get up going to the mirror my hand going over my mouth to stop sobs escaping me . I look ugly . Why hasnt Luke ran from me yet? how could he love me like this?

Luke wraps his arms around me kissing the back of my neck , he whispers " your not ugly your always be beautiful no matter what " making a small smile spread on my lips . Turning around i now face him , hes smiling at me whispers " well i brought you a beanie figured it would make you feel better more then a wig ."

Wrapping my arms around his neck , our lips meet making tears slip out of my eyes but smile in between the kiss . Im so lucky to have him , i dont know what i would do without him .

Taking the black beanie from Luke i slide it on my head before having to go for scans which he of course holds my hand through . If theres anything worse then having cancer , its the chemo . Chemo sucks .

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