[laughing]
I heard that your heart started failing. I got a call from the hospital seven hours ago, but thankfully they stabilized you again. This isn't the first time it's happened, is it?
When I got the call, my whole body felt like it was paralyzed. I couldn't move, speak, think, breathe, I felt nothing but fear. It was like it was consuming my brain so much that I could write a whole thesaurus on that heart wrenching emotion.
I should start right now; terror, fright, fearfulness, horror, alarm, panic, agitation, trepidation, dread, consternation, dismay, distress, anxiety, worry, angst, unease, uneasiness, apprehension, apprehensiveness, nervousness, nerves, perturbation, foreboding; informalthe creeps, the shivers, the willies, the heebie-jeebies, jitteriness, twitchiness, phobia, aversion, antipathy, dread, bugbear, nightmare, horror, terror;
anxiety, neurosis;
That's all I can think of right now. I especially hate the word trepidation. It makes me feel like I'm useless and worth half a penny. It also makes me wonder when it's time to get groceries again.
The only thing I'm glad about is this book. I don't know why I started to write in it, to be honest. I guess it makes me feel less lonely, I can jot down all the thoughts that are swirling around my head, even if it's only once a month. Maybe I'll go psycho, without it. Or maybe it reminds me of you. The cover still has your scent on it. It makes me feel closer to you. Do I sound creepy?
I laughed out loud at that. It's the first time I've done so in weeks.
Thanks for making me laugh again, I love you.
Goodnight, Jungkook.
YOU ARE READING
roses ≫ jikook
Fanfiction"Why are you staring at my umbrella-?" His left eyebrow arched. "It has a hole in it." [ the diary of a broken-hearted boy, lost innocence, and forgiveness ]
