You're Mine. Not His. (Narry Storan/Zouis Talik/Ziall Horlik)

Fuck Part 1

~ Niall's POV ~

"Did I....did we...oh fuck" I asked shakily. I heard him breath out a shaky laugh. How the fuck is he laughing?! We just kissed! AGAIN! Oh fuck me I just cheated on Zayn!!!!! I CHEATED ON ZAYN! MY BOYFRIEND!!! MY FUCKING BOYFRIEND WHO IS LIKE DOWN THE HALL AND HERE I AM MAKING OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE!!! I have never and I mean NEVER cheated on anyone! Oh I'm going to hell! I'm going to fucking hell! I'm going to hell and Satan is going to give me the worst torture ever imaginable. Oh no. Zayn's gonna break up with me! He's going to punch me and break up with me or the opposite because he's not an abusive boyfriend and I deserve it.

"Yeah....I'm pretty sure we did..." he says still chuckling a little bit. A sudden rush of anger toward him went through me. I pushed against his chest making him take a step back. He went quiet almost immediately.

"Its not funny! Oh gawd Brodrick is going to hate me even more and Zay-" I couldn't finish his name. Just thinking about him had a heart wrenching feeling flow through me as if I had just kicked me in my stomach. "Oh God! Zayn! I chea-....and Brody! Fucking hell! I just destroyed two relationships!!! I'm going to hell....I'm going to hell" I was aware I was rambling but I couldn't bring myself to really fucking care. I was going to die and I was going straight to hell.

"Niall....babe" He said trying to calm me.

"Don't...don't call me that please....I can't..." I did feel bad for that but Zayn calls me that and just thinking about losing him was crushing me. "I'm sorry...its just-"

"No...No yeah I totally get it its okay......I ehm.....you're not going to hell Ni...alright? I know it was stupid I shouldn't have kissed you...again and I...I didn't really know you were with him and if I would've known I wouldn't have-"

"No....no don't blame yourself Haz...I kissed back...it wasn't just you alright?? Just stop blaming yourself I wanted to too.....fuck" I didn't want him to blame himself because whether I liked it or not it was both of us, together not just one of us. I knew that was the type of person Harry was, always trying to please everyone and make everyone happy. He would even blame himself for anything if you let him. And I obviously couldn't let him do that because he would even say he tried to rape me if I asked or if it would mean making me happy. I knew he was glad I didn't just throw him under the bus like anyone else would. He searched for my hand in the pitch black. Once he found it he linked our hands together and pulled me close to him. I spose he could sense that I was bout near crying and just held me. I put my forehead onto his shoulder and let a few tears spill. Zayn was going to hate me and break up with me when I tell him and Brody will probably break up with Harry and then it'll all be my fault.

"He'll hate me" I mumbled but my voice didn't sound like myself. He squeezed me tighter with his free hand.

"No Ni no one could ever hate you." Honestly this might be the fastest he's ever talked. Like ever. Besides that one time that he tried rapping Nicki Minaj. "C'mon let's get you to bed alright?" He says while releasing me from our embrace. I nod pulling away from him and trusting him to lead me through the darkness to our designated rooms. Once we neared the room Zayn and I shared I started to freak. How am I spose to go back and sleep in the same bed with Zayn after what I just did!! Harry let go of my hand once we stood in front of the door. "Ni...calm down Ohkay??" he put on hand on my shoulder and I nodded.

"Ok" my voice was a whisper by now.

"I love you...." he said hesitantly. We've all shared the same words before but in a brotherly way. I was unsure of the way Harry meant it just now but I returned the words nonetheless.

"I love you too Hazza" He leaned in and left a lingering kiss on my cheek. I leaned in to it and I felt even more guilty. Fuck I'm screwed. He pulled away and pushed the door further from where it was (I had left it open a bit), encouraging me to go in. I took a breath and walked in closing the door behind me after hearing Harry disappear down the hall. (A/N Niall and Zayn's room is the first room and Harry's is the last) I locked it and walked over to the person I just betrayed. How the fuck do people keep it up. How does the guilt not eat them up?!

I walked over to the bed where Zayn lay asleep. I slipped under the covers next to him as quietly as possible. I should've just slept on the floor. Or the sofa. Maybe then I wouldn't feel like puking when Zayn wrapped his arms around me, his front to my back. His face burrowed in my neck, his breath fanning over me. I think I might cry. I fall asleep with silent tears rolling down my face.

*****

I wake up a couple hours later to a dick pressed against me. "Mmm" Zayn says while shifting closer. He starts kissing my neck sleepily. My body shifts towards him more and he slips a leg over my waist. I can feel his dick against my arse through our pants. He's only half hard and he's half asleep as well. "Horny" he mumbles as he nips at my shoulder. "Want you" he says grinding lazily into me. Fuck. And really I can't say no to this at all. His morning voice making his voice lower and his accent thicker and it goes straight to my dick.

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Hey loves!

       This is only part one of the chapter that was previously titled 'Fuck' I'm trying to get it off of private so y'all can read it properly!

                          Love,

                                    -Beth xxxxxx