Love Vigilantes (Frerard) •AU•

Chapter Thirteen

Gerard P.O.V

I sat on the edge of my bed, waiting until the sun came up. I sobbed silently for the majority of that time. I had work in the morning, but I planned on not doing anything there as usual. When the morning came, I staggered over to the bathroom. The avocado green of the room distorting my vision. My eyes were red and puffy, stubble on my chin. Somehow the stubble on my chin made me look attractive, so I decided to leave it on my cheeks. I splashed cold water on my face, hoping that it would take the redness down. It stopped my eyes from itching, as well as taking the redness down slightly. I didn't know if Frank cared about the fact that I had been crying. Having only seen me on the verge of tears.

Before crying again, I told myself to suck it up. To get ready for work. I pondered the idea of asking if my mother would allow me to go over later; not giving a fuck if Mikey was there. I needed my mother, and I missed her. I sniffled, wiping my eyes, shaking my head.
I pulled on a crisp white shirt, adjusting my tie in the mirror. I looked miserable. But I always did; however this time it was more obvious. I hoped and prayed that nobody at work would notice. Not that they did anyway.

I sighed as I dropped into the driver's seat, my mind swimming with thoughts of him and my developing feelings for him. I gripped the steering wheel as all thoughts of him manifested into something that I couldn't bear to see. It wasn't a good idea to go to work, being in this state, but I had to go. Being a manager had its demands. I managed to control myself before entering the parking lot. My car came to a stop, my head resting in my hands. Pulling myself together, I made sure my business smile was spread permanently across my face, so as to not be suspicious.
                                       ~>•<~

I found myself writing, the sun coming in through the huge glass window behind my desk. It warmed me, offering me comfort in between every knock at my door. People can't function in this place without me, I thought to myself, feeling both flustered and proud in regards to my sense of importance. It felt good to be needed, but I didn't care about the fact that I was needed by them. I wanted to be needed by him. I shook the thought from my head, my teeth grinding together in a bid to drown out their obnoxious noise. I picked up my pen, tapping it against my desk. Every single thought was related to him.

Finally allowing my urge to take over me, I let my ideas flow. I let my small obsession with Frank wash over me and fuel my creativity. After a while of writing non-stop. I smiled, knowing that there was a possibility of me handing this to him one day. That unconscious thought, forced to the front of my mind, made me smile. If he's gay, and I'm gay, we could be together, I thought with that dumb smile spread across my face. I giggled, staring down at my work. Looking around, I made sure that there was nobody at my door before standing up. I practically tore my office apart, trying to find an address book or a diary or anything.
After going though what felt like hundreds of drawers, I found an old, brown journal. The idea of this new little project gave me just as much happiness as when he came to my motel room. I wrote 'Frank Iero' in large cursive writing, the neatest that I could. I taped the first poem into the cover of the journal, contented with my work.

The sun had stopped shining, and I was lift in a dimly-lit office, completely alone. The other employees had gone home hours ago, dropping in to remind me not to strain myself, to sleep. How can I sleep when I'm so happy? I thought to myself. That was the truth. I couldn't. I wouldn't. I sighed, looking at the huge chunk of pages that I had gotten through. Everybody was right, I had to go to sleep. Sometime soon anyway. I opened the drawer in my desk, placing Frank's little book in the centre of it. I closed it, worrying instantly that somebody would go into the draw and find it. I exhaled loudly, telling myself to stop being so dramatic.

After staring at the drawer for at least an hour, I managed to pull myself away from my office. I put on my jacket, adjusting my tie in my reflection in the glass. Stopping myself from checking if the book was still there, I left the room. Nobody was allowed to enter my office anyway, not even the cleaners unless I asked them to. My eyes twitched as I scaled the stairs, coming across nobody. The building was completely empty, and I was more than glad. I looked slightly suspicious, my paranoia would give me away. Not that writing for somebody that you secretly loved was a crime, but loving his gender was a crime.

I twisted the key in my car, tossing my briefcase onto the back seat. Knowing that he worked at the dingy bar, it was the first place that I was headed to.
-------------------------------------------------------
Song Of The Chapter- Robbers by The 1975

A.N
I bloody love The 1975.....
I saw them on Tuesday and Matty cried because he was so proud of how far the band had come in so short a time. I literally wanted to throw myself onto that stage omg...

Anyway, lemme know what you think?? Don't forget to vote because it helps me out ;)