Fools

Chapter 3- stress

*Lauren's POV*

The first week slowly, but surely, came to an end. Now usually on the weekends I'd be out with my friends, either with Ally, Normani, Dinah, and Camila or with Alexa, Lucy, and Vero, but today I just couldn't motivation to go out. The sun dipped below a few roofs of nearby houses and I sighed as I retired to a small bench on my back porch. Saturday was almost over and I hadn't even texted a soul, my phone blown up with many messages.

Why was I staying in? Simple, my mind was too distracted by the mere thought of Camila, I knew that if I had gone out, I'd be spaced out the whole time. Her hair, her eyes, the away she talked, it was all in my head. How was it possible that I, Lauren Jauregui, was falling in love with Camila? My best fucking friend! I ran an aggravated hand through my hair and let out an exasperated sigh.

I was one of the most popular girls in school, along with my friends. I was the captain of the softball team. I was being looked at my Ivy League colleges. And here, in the midst of all these pretty awesome things, I'm sat here falling hopelessly in love with my best friend Camila Cabello. I could just imagine it, telling her how I feel and seeing a look of disgust on her face. Even if she'd like girls, why in the world would anyone as beautiful as her fall in love with me.

I heard my back door open and when I turned around, my eyes met a pair of chocolate ones. I was instantly mesmerized, unable to tear my eyes from the figures. I knew exactly who it was, it was Camila. A whole day of not texting her back, I knew she'd come to my house eventually. Finally ripped my gaze away from hers, I turned back around, watching as the sun gradually got lower below the horizon.

"Lo," Camila started as she took a seat next to me, "why haven't you texted me back a t all today? In fact, why haven't you texted anyone back? We were worried."

"I just wanted to be alone." I whispered half lying, half telling the truth

Her hand fell on my shoulders and I turned to face her, our eyes locking. "We barely saw each other over the whole summer and it's our first real weekend to hang out and YOU wanted to "be alone"?"

"It's nothing Camz."

"That's a lie, Lauren. I see it in your eyes, there's something going on in that head of yours. Everyday this week, each class we shared, I'd watch as you spaced out. Your bottom lip pouting and eyebrows furrowing together as you were so deeply divulged in the depths of your thoughts. What is constantly on your mind?"

Lauren thought about whispering the simple answer "you" but instead she just sighed. "Life. Everything."

"Tell me about it...." Camila whispered pleadingly, moving her hand off my shoulder to tuck a loose piece of hair behind my ear.

"I'm a senior. Captain of the softball team, all honors classes, colleges literally scoping me out, it's stressful but there's another thing. I hate being a senior because I feel like...I feel like we're gonna drift apart...me..you...Dinah...Ally...Mani..."

"LoLo, we're never gonna leave your side...." Camila whispered lightly into my ear, "even when you're a big softball star I'm gonna be right by your side..."

"That's not the only thing eating away at me..."

"What is it?"

"I think...I just...nevermind...you'll judge me..."

"Lauren Jauregui, I would never in a billion years judge you." She said, hurt clear in her voice. I sighed and leaned my head on her shoulder, taking her hand in mine.

"I think...I have feelings for a girl..." Was all I whispered, shutting my eyes tight in fear of what was to come next. I felt a protective arm wrap around my waist and before I knew it, I was closer into Camila's side. I felt a hand touch my face, wiping away tears I didn't even know were falling.

"Shhhh," she cooed, "you're allowed to like who you wanna like, boy or girl."

"That's the thing Camila!," I snapped standing up, "I'm not! How would others react?! My parents, they'd kill me! I'd be a disappointment because of my fucking sexuality." I yelled in a small voice, hot tears burning down my face.

Her arms wrapped around my waist instantly, and I felt myself collapse into her hold. I was now on my knees, my head buried into her sweater covered abdomen. My hot tears were undoubtedly soaking the cute blue sweater she was wearing. "I'm a mess, Camzi...." I muttered gripping on her shirt tightly, more tears stinging as they ran down my pale face, my emerald green eyes most likely blood shot.

"No you're not baby girl," she cooed lightly, kissing the top of my head, "you're a confused teenager, just like the rest of us."

After a few more minutes she pulled back, getting down on her knees so we were face to face. She cupped my cheeks gently and wiped away my tears with her thumbs lightly. I muttered a thank you and a soft, warming smile appeared on her face. It was the smile that made me feel safe even when I was a hot mess like now. "How about I take you upstairs and we watch some TV on your bed?"

I just nodded and she took my hand in hers, our hands fitting together like perfect puzzle pieces. We quietly made our way up to my room, she told me to sit down and get comfortable while she grabbed the remote control. After flipping on the TV she sat by me, opening her arms, as if to tell me to snuggle up against her. I smiled a little bit and scooted over, curling up into her side, my head laying on her chest.

At that moment, I could've sworn everything stood still. I could hear her heartbeat, it was steady and on time, and it made my heart flutter lightly. Being so close to this girl brought me a whole new feeling. I've cuddled with the other girls on movie nights, hearing their heartbeats and smelling their usual sent, but with Camila...it was different...it was so right....it felt so right to be in her arms.

We stayed there, in my bed for four hours, it was eleven thirty when I felt her muscles stretch and her body stir, as if to get off the bed. I held onto her and I heard her chuckle. "I gotta get home LoLo..."

"No Camzi, stay..." I said and pouted, I almost saw her heart break at the sight of how broken I am."

"My mom will kill me..."

"Please Camz....I'll call Sinu if you want and explain you're staying over, she won't be mad."

She sighed in defeat and I smiled, I gave her a pair of sweatpants and a t shirt while I called her mom, explaining she was sleeping over and of course, Sinu said okay. My jaw dropped slightly when Camila walked out of the bathroom wearing my clothes, they looked so much better on her. I swore I saw her cheeks fluster as I stared at her but she quickly turned around, shutting the light off before coming over to the bed.

This time she snuggled up to me, I brought the covers up and wrapped my arms protectively around the smaller girl. I kissed her brown, beautiful hair and I smiled at the closeness. I felt her grip my sweatshirt and bury her head in my chest, muttering a sleepy "I love you Lauren..."

"I love you more, Camila..." I muttered, feeling myself fall asleep as well

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