Time For A Change

Chapter Ten - Walking Away

*Lily’s point of view*

I couldn’t open my eyes, there was an awful pounding inside my head, it was as if my brain was smacking against my skull. Groaning, I pulled the duvet over my head as I heard his quiet, manly chuckles next to me. Panic rushed over me as I looked down realizing I was only in the lacy black and white underwear I had put on yesterday afternoon before the party. I sneakily looked under the duvet at his body which was also practically naked. I gulped, having to tear my eyes away from his beautiful, 6-pack toned body, which was harder done than said.

I tried to remember last night but I couldn’t, I couldn’t remember leaving the last club where we finished off the night, I couldn’t remember what time we left, I couldn’t remember if anything had happened between me and the gorgeous male which happened to be in bed with me. I thought long and hard as the amazing guy next to me had fallen back to sleep, his light snoring filled my ears and his chest moved up and down against my back. I finally gave up, resulting in the last thing I could remember being dancing like a slut all over Jake at a club called ‘fountain’ in the early hours of the morning. Shit, was I late home? My brother would be so disappointed in me. Shit did I still have the I.D? I panicked, pulling my head back out of the darkness and scanning the room. I sighed in relief when I looked at the bed side table finally seeing the small card I had been searching for and when I realized I was in my own room, in my own bed. I sighed, reminding myself that I was practically naked in bed with my practically naked best friend after a messy night out and I couldn’t remember anything; shit. I buried my head in darkness once more, trying to tell myself nothing happened.

I don’t know how much time had passed but I couldn’t lay in bed any longer, not with him. I pulled the duvet off my face, this time the brightness hit me, I felt as if it was blinding me, like I was a vampire that couldn’t meet the sunlight. As I groaned the sun continued to shine through my curtains leaving a faint black shadow over everything in my room. His body was exposed once more, his muscles looking as if they were going to rip out from underneath his skin, I wanted to lick his 6-pack. I shook that thought of out my head, reminding myself I had a boyfriend, a nice caring non-player boyfriend. Why did I have to have a best friend who was a totally gorgeous male god? Why couldn’t he be ugly? Or a geek? I groaned once more as the pounding in my head got worse. How much did I drink last night? I tried to remember in my head, I remember having 2 glasses of vodka and lemonade and 8 shots, I’m sure I had more though but I couldn’t remember, I must have been beyond wasted, anything could have happened.

I looked at Jake who was still fast asleep, snoring ever so quietly next to me. He looked so peaceful with a huge ear to ear beaming smile on his face and I don’t think I’d ever seen him that happy in a long time. Then it hit me as I looked at the most perfect human being in the world, he looked too happy, we didn’t did we? I gulped please say we didn’t, please say we didn’t. Panic rushed over me once more, it was flowing through my veins now, all around my whole body. I gently eased my way out of him arms and out of the bed, practically running to the bathroom. I held onto the sink as tight as I could, my heart was racing so fast in my chest it hurt. Once I managed to slow down my pulse, still not to its usual rate, I started pacing in the small bathroom that held a shower, sink, cabinet, towel rack, toilet and a small red rug on the floor. Chucking water over my face I shivered, tears began to leak from my eyes, dripping down my face blending in with the cold water. I let my weak legs do as they wished as I let go of the sink once again. This time I didn’t walk, I fell, my body hit the tiles beneath me, as I collapsed in the small pool of water. Burying my head into my hands, I cried. I just cried, not caring that Jake was sleeping peacefully in my room not knowing I was crying because of him. I didn’t care that my brother might be annoyed at me if I was late home, I didn’t care that my dad was never around, I didn’t care that everything always ended up in a mess, all I cared about was how I might have messed up my relationship with Ollie, the one thing I had to look forward to when I woke up, I know I haven’t known him long but he was the one person who showed me what I meant to him, the one person who showed he cared, the one person who liked me, the one person I could lose if more than I can remember happened last night.