To The Moon and Back (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 5

Kring... Kring...

I managed to turn off my alarm which probably has been snoozing for a while now. It's already 1 in the afternoon. I must have been really tired or depressed to have slept that long. I changed into a sitting position and I scratched my face and felt that my eyes are swollen. I must have been crying all night.

On this special day, I want everyone to meet my new girlfriend, Mandy Smith.

Ugh! Stop! Why can't you thoughts just leave me alone?

I checked my phone and I have missed calls from Red and Mandy. I don't really want to talk to anyone right now. Good thing it's Sunday so we don't have class. I wouldn't have come to school if we do have class anyway. I can't deal with my problem right now. I really need some more time to think. I tossed my phone on my pillow and stood up. I'm still wearing the red shirt that I wore for the party last night. I wasn't in the mood to change to my pajamas. After Andy and I arrived to the house, I quickly ran to my room and shut the door. He was really worried in the car when he saw me crying the whole time. I couldn't tell him my problems. I didn't have the strength to talk about it.

It's Sunday so I have my piano lessons. The memories when I first played the piano came flashing back to my mind. I remembered when I first touched the piano, I was eight. It was really good, playing the piano of our family. It was my grandmother's. It was given to her by her father and she passed it on to my dad. But since dad didn't really play, it was left as a display in our home. When I was eight, I asked my mom if I could try playing it and she allowed me and it felt to me like I was born to do so. My mom saw that I really love playing the instrument so she sent me to take some lessons. Even though I'm already good at playing, I still take lessons because I got nothing to do during Sundays.

My phone rang again and I checked who's calling. It was Mandy. I quickly pressed decline and tossed the phone back to the pillow. I got up the bed and decided to take a shower. I read somewhere that taking a shower keep your mind off things. It's like some psychology thing. Well then I guess it's time to find out.

I went inside the bathroom and turned on the shower to a moderate temperature. I didn't really want to burn myself or freeze to death.
The water felt nice against my skin. Every drop is like a tiny hand trying to comfort me. Then everything seems blurry again. All the horrible things that happened to me still hurt me. I let tears from my eyes fall with the water. I should be out of tears already, I know, but my body seems to be with me. It's supporting me on what I'm going through.

I thought of Keith. Everything about him that made me fall for him. His face, his body, his hair and of course..his eyes. This is what's bad about falling in love, too much emotions flooding all over you and when your love gets rejected, the emotions become stronger. Stronger than you could imagine.

I know it's my fault, all of it. Why should I blame Mandy when I'm the one who stupidly expected something from Keith. I'm the one who was and still is head over heels in love with Keith. I'm the one who was blind to what's happening around me. Blind for not seeing that there was something going on with my best friend and my crush. I was too focused about myself that I didn't ask how Mandy is, if there is something awesome going on with her life. I was too self-absorbed about how I feel about Keith and didn't even see that Mandy might have been hurting because she couldn't tell me all about it.

But of course, there's still a part of me that can't help but feel hate. Hate for my best friend for keeping it all, for not telling me anything. Hate for her for giving me false hope that there could be something out there for me. Now, reality has come and punched me in the face. Keith has no feelings for me, he never had and he never will.