When in London (One Direction Fan Fiction)

30

I watched him with reservation, trying to comprehend everything he was saying.

"I don't want to leave; not without you," he sighed, and I tried to keep my facial reactions at bay. The more he said, the more I was starting to feel apprehensive. "I don't think you understand how much I love you, Katie. I want you with me, and I couldn't say goodbye to you without saying all this so I-"

"Niall," I cut him off,  raising my hands to motion for him to stop. My eyes were wide with shock as I looked into his bright blue ones. I needed him to stop. As hard as it was for me to admit it to myself, I didn't want to hear about how he wanted to spend one of the most important years of his life with me by his side.

I didn't want to know exactly how badly he wanted me to stick around because, quite frankly, I knew that it wouldn't be possible to do so. At least, not at that time. I was about to move out and start the next four years of my life at university, and he was about to leave the country and go on tour. He was in the middle of his astoundingly successful career, and no matter what he said I knew he knew that he didn't have time for much else.

And that scared the living hell out of me.

Of course, I knew that he loved me, but for him to love me that much, that fast, was causing my head to spin. I wasn't ready to be wanted that hard.

"Please," I breathed, my voice caught in my throat, "stop."

In the midst of the silence that followed, the microwave rang loudly, causing me to jump. I moved around Niall's broad frame quickly, taking out the now inflated bag of popcorn and pouring its contents into an empty bowl. I rested my hands against the counter, keeping my back turned to him as I tried to process my thoughts.

"Shit," Niall laughed nervously from behind me. "I just fucked everything up, didn't I?"

"No- I just..." I trailed, still turned away from him as I tried to find the right words.

The fact of the matter was we had only been 'together' for a week, and not even officially. I needed time, and I'd already told him that before I agreed to this, whatever this was. I went from being in a long term relationship, to breaking up and starting a new relationship all in the span of a couple months. I had barely given myself any time to adjust to being single before I jumped head first into new love with someone else.

I wasn't ready for all of this, and I was finally starting to realize it.

I turned around, facing him again.

"Let's not talk about this right now, okay? It's our last night, I just want to be with you and not think about anything else for a while. Can we do that?" I bit my lip, waiting for his response.

I was unsure of how my dismissal of his rant would go over with him as I watched him eye me from across the counter. After what felt like hours, a smile slipped onto his lips and he sighed, coming to stand in front of me once more.

"We can do whatever you want," he said lowly, tucking a loose tendril of hair behind my ear. He leaned his hands against the counter behind me, trapping me in his arms. "It's your last night here. I'm all yours, what do you want to do?"

I smiled, setting a hand on his chest and pushing lightly.

"I don't think I can make it through the end of the movie without passing out," I said, making my way out of the kitchen. "I'm gonna go to bed."