Doubt [Third Book]

sixteen

Joey's POV

"What the fuck? You made me spill my drink, dick!" a girl with an annoyingly high-pitched voice scolds me as I storm through the crowded frat house, one person on my mind.

I stop when I see the familiar face of Meghan, sitting with a group of other girls and laughing. She's always been one of the nicest ones of our group. I walk towards her and she immediately notices.

"Oh, hey Joey. How've you been?" she asks, standing up and walking closer to me. I almost break down at the simple question filled with so much meaning, but I don't. I can't. I have a reputation to live up to.

"Where's Shane?" I snap, ignoring her question all together. She sighs, pointing down a hallway.

"Second room on the left. I wouldn't bother him if I were you." she warns me, her eyes narrowing. Quickly they soften and it seems as if she's giving me a look of pity.

"Thanks." I mutter, storming away and pushing her warning and the look in her eyes to the back of my mind.

As I inch closer to the room, something doesn't feel right. I'm not sure if it's just the anger inside of me or the pain I'm feeling deep down, but something just isn't right. Once I'm in front of the door, my stomach ties in knots. The feeling is unusual for me, but I try to ignore it as I twist the handle and push the door open.

Shane lies on the bed, asleep, and anger fuels my veins.

"You fucking asshole!" I scream, my feet moving faster than my brain. But as I reach him, I notice something unusual.

A bottle is in his hand and I slowly peel his fingers from it, my jaw dropping. An empty bottle of pills. I look to the bedside table, my eyes beginning to pool with tears as I notice a note.

Dear founder,

I'm sorry you had to find me. I really am. I'm also sorry I didn't tell anyone how I was feeling. It was all a facade. I've never been happy. I'm not the bubbly, easygoing Shane you've always seen. I'm torn. I'm in love with someone who will never love me back. Do you know how painful that is?

I'm sorry I couldn't do this anymore. It all became too much for me to handle. My mask was slowly cracking, and now it has completely shattered.

Much love,
Shane

The tears are streaming down my face before I can stop them. I turn towards him, noticing his chest isn't moving. He's dead.

My pain is soon replaced with anger as I punch the wall, leaving a hole the size of my fist. I sob, crumbling down onto the floor with my face in my hands.

This is all my fault.

(a/n: unexpected death (: who do you think Shane is...was...in love with?)