[De] Attachment (A PartyNextDoor Story)

.45

~~ Nakita T. Ncube ~~
Wednesday June 10th 2015
Toronto, Canada.

As per usual, my Wednesday's are pretty dead. I had studio this morning with Mako. Then studio with Roy but then he had to go vocal coaching so now I'm back in my office.

Whilst I'm clicking through my Facebook, a message appears in my inbox. I stare at the name for a while before opening it.

'Thandiwe. I just want to talk to you. Please. Meet me at at Hard Rock Cafe at five?' It's from Courtney.

I'm a person who doesn't benefit from closure. Closure does me no good. But I've never had closure a good five years later. I'm not hurting over it anymore so this may be good for me.

I finish work at 5 though so I'm still finna wait until then. Then I'll go. I'm not in a rush.

**

I get out of my car around half past 5. There was a little traffic on the way here.

I walk to the door. Somebody coming out, opens the door. I step aside letting them pass before stepping in myself.

I see Courtney's blonde hair. I walk across the cafe and stand beside the table.

"Omg hi. I didn't think you'd come. Hi. Hey. Hi" she says completely surprised.

"Please sit down" she says. I sit down, noticing that she's wearing the hard rock uniform.

"You look great. Wow. You've changed a lot. But you look amazing." She says still talking.

"Thandiwe please. Say something" I have no empathy for the girl but she has issues. She wants to be accepted. 

"What do you want me to say?" I ask.

"I just want to apologise."

"Go ahead. I'm here aren't I?"

"I am sorry for what I did to you. I-"

"Can we not refer to it as that. Just tell me what you did"

"I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend. I don't want to say the wrong thing God. I umm... I remember that day and I haven't forgiven myself for that day. But I'm promising you now,  isithembiso, it was once. I had never ever made a pass at him, he had made passes at me" she says. She looks like she's about to cry.

"If you cry I'm standing up and I'm leaving" I say sternly. She nods her head.

"Please just ask me anything. I want to give you answers"

"How?" I ask.

"Umm I was at your house. You said you'd be home soon and let him in when he got there. So I let him in. And we were just talking and my social phobia came up. And he used that. He used that and I ended up sleeping with him. And then you came home and that's when I realised I fucked up." She says.

"You used my boyfriend to feel accepted? Honestly Courtney"

"I didn't mean to. But I know I didn't stop it either. And I apologise for that. And now I have a son who is a constant reminder of what I did to you. The only thing I can think about is that I wanted you to be my son's God mother but I can't have that. I don't deserve that."

"Okay"

"Thandi I-"

"My name is Thandiwe"

"Do you-"

"Why did Noah come to my job?"

"He told me it was best to leave it all in the past and I told him it wasn't because I would have forever committed a wrongful act against you and I would never have apologised. He wouldn't tell me where you worked. He barely knew himself but he tried three different places before coming to your job"