If I'm Not In Love

14

Daig ko pa ang may hangover dahil sa sakit ng ulo ko because of lack of sleep. Hindi ako nakatulog magdamag kakaisip sa ngiti ni Ethon. Nagsisi pa nga ko dahil hindi ko naisip na picturan siya. Hindi ko nagamit ang ninja moves ko. And for a record, I was running late for my first class. That's why I ran to life para lang makaabot ako on time. But fate did some scheming though. I stopped running and walked backwards to looked at the newly posted pictures on the bulletin board. I was just staring at it until I felt someone pulled my hair that forced me to avert my gaze to the pictures.

"You're going to cut class again?" asked Troy who was standing behind me.

I sighed then looked at my watched. 8:03AM. We're three minutes late. I shook my head and grabbed Troy's hand and dragged him towards our classroom. Good thing naabutan namin yung prof na papasok pa lang. So, we're not really late.

"That makes sense," sabi ni Troy habang nakaupo kami sa ilalim ng puno.

"Huh?" I frowned.

Troy shifted his angle to face me. "He doesn't want you to see it live. That's why he asked you out of the blue," he deduced.

My forehead creased as I remembered the pictures. It's Ethon and Melissa's pictures. I shook my head and smiled. "Does it mean he cares for my feelings?" I asked then looked back at Troy.

He shrugged. "You guess"

I shook my head then stood up. I extended my hand and offered it to Troy. He laughed as he stared at my hand then accepted it before he stands up.

"Ever a gentlewoman," he commented then rested his arm around my shoulder as we started walking.

I chuckled, "You know that"

Dumaan ulit kami sa corridor kung saan nakapaskil ang bulletin board na may pictures nila Ethon at Melissa. I stopped to look for it again but then, ginulo ni Troy yung buhok ko which absolutely and definitely distracted me.

"Ugh! Troy!" I hissed.

He knew very well na paggulo lang sa buhok yung makakapagdestruct sakin when I was lost in my thoughts and nothing else. Not even delicious foods or whatsoever. He grinned tapos tinulungan niya kong ayusin ang ginulo niyang buhok ko. Umiling siya pagkatapos at tumingin din sa mga litrato.

"So, it's official. He let everyone knows that he's courting Mel," he said as his eyes fixated at one photo as to where Ethon was giving Melissa a bouquet of flowers.

I didn't answer. At the back of my mind, I expected this to happen. I am neither an optimistic nor pessimistic person. I am a realist as to where I'm thinking everything in balance. I do think in negative way to prepare myself from any heartaches, but I'm still hoping and doing my best for a positive outcome. I smiled then averted my gaze. Pinulupot ko ang braso ko kay Troy at hinila na siya paalis sa tapat ng bulletin board.

"May karibal ka na," sabi ko kay Troy.

I can feel his stares on me pero diretso lang yung tingin ko habang naglalakad kami sa corridor.

"Who?" he asked.

I tightened my grip on his arm then looked up at him. "Ethon," I answered curtly.

His eyebrows raised then he pulled my hair lightly. "It takes a man dying for the girl I like to make me jealous, Lala," he retiliated.

I slapped his arm playfully. "Oy, grabe ka! Your mouth continued to become unholy"

I felt his shoulder vibrated kaya napailing na lang ako.

"Nasaan na si Melissa?" I asked nang papunta na kaming canteen.

I'm looking forward for this, alam ko kasing sasabay ulit samin si Ethon.

"Absent," tanong ni Troy.

"Bakit daw?" I frowned.

Troy shrugged, "Walang sinabi"

I sighed. So, mali pala ko. Kung walang Melissa, walang Ethon. Of course, I'm worried to Melissa, baka may sakit. Hindi naman kasi umaabsent yun.

"Can I join here?" sabi Nico na bigla na lang naglapag ng tray sa tabi ko.

"Sure," sagot ni Troy.

I, somehow frowned and stared at him, "Hindi mo sasamahan yung mga friends mo?" I asked.

"Palagi ko na silang kasama araw araw, nakaumay na," sabi nito sabay tawa ng malakas.

"Hoy Nicholai! Narinig namin yon!" sigaw ng lalaki sa kabilang table.

Nico shook his head at nagsimula ng kumain kaya gumaya na din ako. Samantalang si Troy paubos na yung pagkain.

"Bakit mo ginawa yun?" tanong ko after namin maglunch.

Nico creased his forehead as he stared at me. "Ang alin?" he asked.

"Pinagcut mo kami para hindi ko mapanood yung live show kahapon"

He looked away right after I've finished my sentence then sighed. "Sorry. I'm just worried on how will you going to react."

"It's okay," I smiled at him convincingly "I already prepared myself for it actually, so.. No biggie"

He stared at me na medyo napatagal pa. I kinda felt uneasy habang tinititigan niya ko na para akong isang queen ng chess board na nacheckmate na ng kalaban at pinag-iisipan niya kung paano itatago para hindi makain.

"Uy!" I snapped my fingers on his face. "Anong iniisip mo?" I raised my eyebrows.

He narrowed his eyes on me, "Okay lang sayo? I mean.. You like him right? Hindi ka ba nagseselos?" he asked.

I chuckled, "Yes, I like him, but I'm not his girlfriend to get jealous," I shrugged.

He scowled then shook his head. "Wala namang batas na girlfriends or boyfriends lang ang pwedeng magselos. It's a feeling that's under control. Nagiging masama lang kapag ginagawan na ng aksyon, like hurting the person whom you get jealous with. Dun mo pwedeng sabihin na wala kang karapatan because hurting someone ain't ever be right."

I looked at him amused. This guy is so unpredictable. He never failed to amazed me. "Wow, speech!" That's all I was managed to say. I was taken aback actually.

"Paano ba yan, mauuna na ko. Laters Lala, Troy," paalam nito at sumabay na sa mga kaibigan niya.

"Satisfied?" I asked Troy.

Hinila niya yung buhok ko saka umiling bago tumayo.

"What?" I huffed.

"Let's go," he said then stepped away.

Hinatid ako ni Troy pauwi. The moment I stepped inside the house, I suddenly remembered Mama said over the phone yesterday. Shoot. Mabilis akong nagpalit ng damit at kinuha ang wallet at phone ko saka lumabas ng bahay. Malapit lang naman ang banko dito. Mama made sure before she bought the house na very convenient ang place for me, para hindi ako mahirapan sa byahe. And I'm very thankful for that kasi walking distance lang at ang laki ng natitipid ko sa allowance ko. Pagkatapos kong magwithdraw, dumaretso na ko sa supermarket para mamili ng stocks sa bahay. I wasn't expecting anything but seems like fate is in my favor again. I smiled and walked towards to Ethon na namimili ulit ng junk foods. Tinabi ko ang dala kong pushcart at tumayo ako sa gilid niya at kinuha yung clover na cheese flavor. I know it's not for him because I remember Nico mentioned na hindi siya kumakain ng ganito.

The creased on his forehead deepened as he stared at the clover im handing to him. My smile widened, "She only likes cheese flavors," I said at ako na yung naglagay sa basket niya.