The Elements (CURRENTLY BEING EDITED AND REWRITED)

21. You idiot.

I turned around and buried my face in this warm and puffy pillow. The stupid sun tried to wake me up but that's not going to happen honey. My pillow was so warm and it has a minty breath. Wait what?

I opened my eyes faster than my lightning bolts. I screamed and fell on the floor when I came into view with a face.

"WHAT'S WRONG??" Black yelled and jumped out of the bed looking around.

"What the hell are you doing in my room and bed??"

He stopped and looked at me confused. "You don't remember?"

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Remember wh-Oh." I said when last night event came back.

"Light, it wasn't your fault." he said trying to make me feel better.

"How do you know what happened in my dream, memory, nightmare or whatever the fuck it was?"

He scratched the back of his neck. "Well.....I can read peoples minds. But I only did it because I didn't know what was happening! This is the only time I did it! I swear!" he said fast gesturing with his hands.

"It's fine." I said tired.

I am tired, but this is that kind of tired that sleep could heal. That kind of tired when you can stare at a blank wall for hours without feeling a fucking thing.

I heard him sigh. "I'll go and make breakfast because apparently River wants a day off." He sigh again when he saw that I wasn't answering him. "I'll just go and you should take a shower."

After he waited 5 minutes for me to say something and receiving nothing, he finally left. When he closed the door I ran and locked it.

I don't want to talk with anyone for a while and I don't have the guts to face my brothers right now. Yes, I'm a coward but I just can't. I don't want to see their disappointed faces or the sadness and anger in those blue-green eyes. If I would, I don't know how I would react. Probably I'll run away and kick something and break down after a while, or I would break down in front of them and to be honest I don't want any of those 2 variants to happen, so I'll just stay here.

I took a very long shower and cried a little because who wouldn't and I changed into a pair of black shorts and a black shirt that said *Internal breakdown*. I climbed back in my bed and snuggled into my blanket hugging my pillow to my chest. It still smells like Black. Like a forest after a rainy day. I fucking love that smell but don't tell him I said that. It would boost his ego to much.

I was about to fall asleep when the doorknob jiggled.

"Light? Why did you locked the door? I came with your breakfast." Black said when he saw that the door wouldn't bulge open.

I remained silent.

"I have waffles and jellies." he tried to make me open the door.

"I'm not hungry, Black. Leave me alone." I said and buried my face deeper into the pillow.

He mumbled something that I couldn't understand before he sighed. "Fine, but if you're hungry there's food in the kitchen."

I heard his footsteps fading away.

A nod has formed in my neck and I was about to cry again.

How the things would be now if I wasn't so stupid back then?

My parents would be here and we all would be a big happy family in a big house with 3 dogs and maybe one cat. But it's too late now to dream about such things.

It's too late because my parents and it's my fault. Even if I don't remember to much things about them I miss them, especially my dad. He was very tall, I think as tall as River maybe even taller, with the same ash blond hair and blue-green eyes as me and Lincoln. From what I remember, I was his favorite while Sam was mama's favorite.