One True Bond (COMPLETE)

Aryan Khan

I like Kajol. She lets me make a lot of mess probably because she always says Papa will clean it up. She always does fun things with me and even manages to make homework fun but when she tells me off I feel bad for making her angry. People think I don't know what's going on. Papa told me I wouldn't be having a baby brother because Kajol wasn't having a baby anymore. I don't understand why she's not having a baby anymore and it makes me feel sad. Mummy thinks I don't know anything either but Auntie Shehnaz isn't as good at hiding the newspapers and magazines as mummy is. I don't understand why mummy says she's having papa's baby and I don't understand why people are exaggerating a story about papa and Kajol.
"Shall we put them in the oven now?" Kajol smiles at me. Her eyes look empty and sad but I nod anyway. I open the oven and Kajol puts the tray of cookies on the middle shelf.
"Now shall we clean up this mess or let Shah Rukh do it?"
"Let's make papa do it," I laugh and run to the sofa. I reach for the remote but Kajol gets it before me and puts it behind her. She looks serious.
"We are quite similar really," Kajol begins, "we both think that if we hide our emotions we won't make other people sad." I look down at Kajol's hands in her lap palms up.
"Mmm," I murmur.
"My family jokes that the only reason I'm good at acting is because I bottle up all my emotions and then release them for the camera," Kajol laughs a little, "but there's nothing wrong with letting your emotions out. Aryan do you understand what's happening?" I look up.
"Papa says I'm not going to have a baby brother anymore because you're not having a baby," I say, "but I don't understand where the babies gone?" The ends of Kajol's lips crease.
"Sometimes God has different paths for us to follow and the path for the baby was to go and help God in heaven," she says reaching for my hands.
"Are you sad about it?" I ask squeezing her fingers.
"Yes but there were also a lot of happy times," Kajol smiles at me. I shrug.
"Was there?" I ask furrowing my eyebrows.
"Do you remember when we were going to buy stuff for the nursery and you were grumpy all day because you're room was painted cream," Kajol says, "and then we came home and Shah Rukh had arranged for a designer to come and help you redecorate your room. You said you didn't mind having a baby brother or sister as long as you got treats too." I squeeze Kajol's fingers again to stop myself from getting upset.
"But doesn't that make you feel sad?" I question again.
"No because even though it's sad that you're not going to get a baby brother or sister yet one day it will happen. But out of all the sadness comes some happiness and one day whether that's tomorrow, next week, next month or next year, Aryan this sadness will get smaller and whenever you think about it you'll remember all the happiness that goes with that sadness too. So one day it won't make you as sad as it does today," she smiles at me and I can see tears glistening in her eyes.
"So it's okay to be sad?" I ask feeling tears pricking the back of my eyes. Kajol nods.
"Because if you don't let it out now the sadness will build up and become anger and then one day you'll explode and you won't know why so it's best to let it out now while me and Shah Rukh are here to help you," she lets go of my hands and puts her arms around me pulling me closer to her as I let my tears escape my eyes. I like Kajol. She smells nice and feels warm. She also explains things nicely so I can understand.
"If you ever have any other questions Aryan just ask me or Shah Rukh and we will try to answer them," Kajol whispers into my hair and I lift my head up.
"Whys mummy saying she's having papa's baby?" I sniffle, "I don't understand how when they are not together anymore." Kajol opens her mouth to speak before closing it again. She attempts to speak another three times.
"Do you remember your birthday party?" Kajol finally asks getting off the sofa and walking over to the oven.
"Haan," I reply as she opens the oven and removes the tray placing it on the work surface.
"Shah Rukh came didn't he?" Kajol smiles turning off the oven and coming back to sit on the sofa next to me.
"Yeah he gave me a remote control helicopter," I say excitedly wiping my cheeks.
"And I didn't come because he said I was ill," Kajol continues and I nod, "well Shah Rukh was upset, confused and got a little tipsy and you know things happened."
"But mummy's with Ravinder?" I furrow my eyebrows again and cross my arms.
"Yeah she is," Kajol tries to explain again, "and Shah Rukh doesn't know if it is his or not because your mummy is with Ravinder."
"Does papa love you then?" I uncross my arms as Kajol pulls a thoughtful face and doesn't say anything.
"I guess but you'll have to ask him," she finally responds before giving me the TV remote and ruffling my hair. I stare at the remote for a couple of seconds trying to figure out how to word what I want to say. Kajol gets of the sofa and goes over to the kitchen opening the dishwasher and beginning to load it. I run over to her and hug her from behind. I squeeze her tight and close my eyes until all I can see is black.
"I love you Kajol," I whisper into her back.
"I love you too Aryan," she whispers back.