Lindsey walked into his studio and poured himself a drink before putting his head in his hands. How had he thought this would never be found out? How had he thought that he wouldn't ever get curious about them? He thought on all of it and he may not have wanted to be their father, but he had never thought that Stevie wouldn't be a part of his life. He had guessed he would always be in the kids' lives even if it wasn't as a father. He knew that Stevie would take excellent care of them, he was never concerned about that. He had forced himself to distance himself from those children, honestly to never even think about them as his as he knew that he couldn't live a double life with two families and he knew he wasn't going to leave Kristen and Will when Stevie told him about Grayson. What he hadn't counted on was the fact that Stevie's love for him would run out.
"So were you just going to keep the fact that you saw Stevie secret from me?" Lindsey heard Kristen's voice behind him and sighed heavily before turning his chair around.
"No, you don't get to act annoyed here Lindsey. I didn't have to take you back after finding out you'd been having sex with her for our entire marriage and that she had given birth to two of your children, but you promised that it had stopped and it was a mistake."
"And it was Kristen. I haven't seen Stevie since the day that I quit the band. I swear to you. I didn't mention the thing with Stevie because I just didn't think it was a big deal. I wanted to forget about it before starting something else."
"I believe you Lindsey, but what are we going to do about this?"
"I don't know. I never imagined this happening. I think I have to talk to Stevie and see if I can get her to agree to this. I'm afraid if we don't let him see the girl then he will tell this and that will open up something that we don't want to be a part of."
"The girl? Lindsey, did Stevie really tell you to stay away from those kids or was what Will said right?"
"She did tell me to stay away when I signed away my parental rights." He said with a huge sigh, "but she asked me to sign my rights away because I told her that I didn't want the kids. The day you met Stevie was the day she asked me to sign over my rights. Partially because that was the first time I saw her daughter."
"YOUR daughter, Lindsey. You both made those kids. How could you lie to me like this all of this time? I didn't understand why you'd agree to sign your rights away, but I assumed that if she really didn't want you involved it was between the two of you. But, now hearing all of this, I feel like I don't even know you Lindsey!"
"Look, I know what I did was wrong. All of it, but the kids were not supposed to happen, I would have told her not to have them when she told me, I honestly thought, with her being older that Grayson would be the only one and she was so happy and I thought it would be her only chance to be a mother and I couldn't tell her that she couldn't have it. I couldn't. I just acted like I didn't care and told her that I already had a family and wouldn't be involved. She said she could handle it alone. And she did."
"How could you think that was OK? Never mind the cheating, I'll get to that, but how would you even think it was appropriate to just go along with a pregnancy when you were already married? That bringing a child into world knowing you wouldn't be involved was OK? This is insanity!"
"I felt like I owed her Kristen, I owed it to her to not throw a fit over a baby. She deserved to get that much. If I could give her the one thing in the world she wanted the most, I wanted to. It was my fault she didn't have it in the first place."
"What the fuck does that even mean Lindsey?" Kristen yelled while Lindsey paced back and forth in front of her running his hands through his hair.
"It means we were supposed to get married. She and I. When you told me that you were pregnant with Will, we were supposed to be getting married in 4 months. Stevie took the news very hard and miscarried 3 days later. She told me it was over and to go be with my family and so I did, but..."
"But you kept sleeping with her anyway. Why the fuck am I just now hearing about all of this Lindsey? I'm your wife, don't you think this was something that I should have known? That you were about to marry another woman, that she was carrying your baby?"
"What good would that have done exactly Kristen?"
"Just answer me this, when you were still carrying on a relationship with her, was it just sex or did you still have feelings for her?" His thoughts immediately turned to the nights he held Stevie in his arms, pressing his lips against her bare shoulder and whispering those very words in her ear.
"God Kristen, why are we doing this?"
"WERE YOU STILL TELLING HER THAT YOU LOVED HER LINDSEY? It's not that fucking hard."
"Kristen, I've known Stevie since I was 16 years old. I..."
"Don't give me that bullshit that you tell reporters. Did the words "I love you Stevie" come from your mouth?"
"Yes." He whispered.
"Oh my God, I... I can't believe this. You've been in love with her all of this time."
"No. No Kristen, that's not true. I love you Kristen. I love everything we have together and I wouldn't trade it for anything." Lindsey said, grabbing her hand as Kristen used the other to wipe the tears from her eyes.
"Figure everything out for Will. I need to be alone right now." She whispered and left Lindsey standing alone in his studio.
He called around as inconspicuously as possible and finally tracked down Mick and Stevie's home number and called over and over until someone finally answered.
"Hello?" he heard her raspy voice and she sounded breathless.
"Stevie? It's Lindsey. We have to talk, in person. Now."
Okay guys, just a few quick things I wanted to say. Thank you all so much for all your comments and I'm sorry that I haven't gotten to most of them and I promise I will, it's just hard to keep up when I post like 5 updates in a day. Secondly, I'll be hiking in the mountains until Monday, so no service of any sort. My question is, do you want an extra update today or on Monday? Thanks so much for reading!
